I am so sorry for your loss. Sending hugs and best wishes your way...look after yourself.
Just a quick thought about your partner - perhaps he is just taking some time to process what has happened? Men+ often grieve differently to women so while he may seem withdrawn and a bit distant, maybe he is just coming to terms with what has happened in his own way?
Your story made me cry. I am so sorry that you had to go through that, nobody should have to go through that much hurt and pain and you should never blame yourself! sometimes they can't explain what happened and it will just hurt you more if you blame yourself. And i agree with SS_Storm in that your partner is dealing with it the way all men deal with things, he probably feels that he needs to be strong for you and he just doesnt know how to handle it all.
Thank you all for your kind words and thoughts... I am a waterfall of emotions and go from being ok and think, yep I can do this. To breaking down and not knowing how I can get through the pain.
My partner has still not given me any reaction... after tue he did not even come home until I begged him on Friday.. he did for a couple of hours but if I tried to talk about it would tell me to stop winging at him or he would go back out... which he did a few hours later, I asked him, dont you know what I am feeling.. he said "dont you f'n know I have feelings too" I guess this is just his way of dealing with it... pretending nothing has happend?
My best friends have been amazing... and so has the vodka lol... I just wish my love would give me something... I hope he will soon.
I think perhaps it may be hard for him as he was so excited and told so many people about our baby.. where as I only told my best frineds and family.. Perhaps me being over cautious, over stressed that somehting would go wrong.. caused this to happen? I just wish I could go back I wish with all of my heart my little was still growing inside me. I feel like I am dying inside.
Don't blame yourself, Brokenhearted. We must never blame ourselves for these things. I am so, so sorry that you lost your little one so early. I had a similar m/c two years ago and I still remember how painful and absolutely devastating it was. I ended up going on anti-depressants to keep myself from falling into the blackness. I now have a little boy who will turn 1 next month and consider myself lucky and blessed. Sending you lots and lots of healing vibes and the hugest hugs. Take time to grieve and be gentle to yourself. You've had a traumatic experience. I'm glad you have such good friends around you and I hope your DP is able to reconnect with you and give you the support you need.
Brokenheart I'm so very sorry you are going through this. It is such a difficult time for both you and your partner. Like the girls have said previously men do grieve differently to us women at times like this. I know my DH was a mess with each of our losses. I couldn't understand why he was behaving the way he was but he told me eventually that he was hurting and it was killing him seeing me hurting so he needed to get away for a bit.
Please be gentle with yourself and your DP. You have both just suffered a loss and it takes time to heal both physically and emotionally. Whatever you do please do not blame yourself for what has happened. It isn't anyone's fault and blaming yourself doesn't help you heal. I'm sending you a massive
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and you should never blame yourself! sometimes they can't explain what happened and it will just hurt you more if you blame yourself. And i agree with SS_Storm in that your partner is dealing with it the way all men deal with things, he probably feels that he needs to be strong for you and he just doesnt know how to handle it all.
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