Spring Angel : Thank you for the kind words. Its bad enough losing him at 23 weeks but 36 has to be worse. I am so sorry.
I can see a small light at the end of my tunnel but it's reaching it that is becoming a problem. I am trying to do all the right things, but I am finding out that there really isn't much more I can do. I want to stay strong for my boys, and positive for my husband but it's so hard.

csab: I guess that is how I am feeling. I just want to TTC again and want that desire to feel complete again. My arms ache with such an empty pain that I can't even describe. I just know that it is important to make sure that I have given myself time to grieve. Some days I feel ok, happy even but then I feel like I am falling back down the tunnel and that is what is stopping me from wanting to try again. I don't think I could make it through another loss. My fear of going through this again, is too great. I don't know how you and all the other women survive more than one loss. But sharing like this helps. It helps me feel that I am not alone with this heartache.