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Thread: Need help to move on and not be critisied

  1. #19

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    Dec 2007
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    Australia
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    Hi just posting again. i have left my boyfriend because i just cant cope anymore. I asked if we could do something special for 11th Jan (EDD) and he asked what for? I said EDD and he said why would you want to do something. So that there was a breaking point for me. I have turned to my mother for help and support and am now seeking help. For my lil boys "remberance day" as my mum likes to call it I am heading off to Sydney for the day by myself. I'm going to wear no mascara and feel what i feel. I am going to set some balloons off (thanks lyn) and write a letter to him. My mother is buying me a pandora charm braclet and i'm going to buy a lil B which stands for a will honour my Baby Boy Brayden. I'll let you know how it goes. x


  2. #20

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    Oct 2004
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    WA y WA y A WAy
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    i just wanted to give you a massive big hug Emma you sound like a very courageous woman you've been through so much so i wanted to let you know that you are in my thoughts

  3. #21

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    Oct 2007
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    Middle Victoria
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    Hi Emma

    I love the balloon idea. I lost a childhood friend, and took a big bunch of helium balloons to her funeral, and still like to release one on each anniversary date.

    I'm glad you have your mum for support. Will be thinking of you on Jan 11.

    Take care,

    Kate

  4. #22

    Join Date
    Jun 2007
    Location
    Melbourne, Victoria
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    500

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    Hi Emma. I have found my local SIDS and Kids to be amazing. They offer free counselling and support groups for people who have lost babies through miscarriage, stillbirth and SIDS. I would suggest you call them and if they are in your area they could send a counsellor around to your house to talk to you.

    We had a woman come and see DH and I, and she was amazing. She just let us talk and occasionally asked questions. She gave me an outfit that would fit a 20 week gestation baby, which is beautiful. These are made by woman who has generally lost babies as well. I am also going to attend the support groups.

    I hope you find the help you need.

  5. #23

    Join Date
    Dec 2007
    Location
    New York
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    emma - I just wanted to say I am so sorry that you are going through this. I am glad your mom is getting you a bracelet and "remembrance day" is a wonderful idea. Big hugs

  6. #24

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    Emma, I'm sorry that your boyfriend has not been supportive but I'm glad that you have your mum. It sounds like you have planned some beautiful things to do for Brayden on his remembrance day. Jewellery is a beautiful way to remember your angel. I had a pendant made which is a star with Cooper's name across it. Will be thinking of you on the 11 January

  7. #25

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    I am so sorry for what you are going through Emma, I hope you find lots of support and you have people around you to give you the strength you need to get through the days

  8. #26

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    Hi Emma - I have read your post and could not pass by without replying.
    I am terribly sorry for all 3 of yoru losses. May your litle angels always watch over you form heaven.
    I have too had a termination when I was 19, and also have broken up with my partner at that That time ? I just could not handle being next to him. I hated him with all my heart for not wanting our baby. And also hated when people told me of my age. Things like that hit you even harder when you are young, because you are no experienced enough to cope with them. It has taken me almost 3 years to get over the loss and the guilt until I fell pregnant again. I was on top of the world, until mu bub has passed at 11.5 weeks, which has made it absolutely unbearable ever since. We have also almost split up with my (ex) partner, mostly because of me not coping and him not understanding, and him not coping with me. It has been almost 4 months and I?m still suffering. There are some days, when I think that I have moved, and many times, when I wish I will never wake up in the morning, but I am hoping it will pass. We still have many years ahead of us and many more chances to make perfectly healthy babies. Thinking of you
    xoxoxo

  9. #27

    Join Date
    Jun 2007
    Location
    Colorado, USA
    Posts
    241

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    emma- i am so sorry for your loss of Brayden. i have no words to make your pain go away, no matter how much i wish i did. you have made difficult choices to the best of your ability, and of course they are the right choices. no one else can know your circumstances. we all do the best we can at the time we are presented with painful situations, and you are a strong lady. i know only too well that you probably don't feel strong, i even wanted to pop someone in the head for saying i was strong because i felt so horrible. but you are strong, and you can make it. this is such a painful journey, and it never ends. but perhaps it might become less painful someday. for now, please be good to yourself, find the support you need and allow yourself to feel whatever it is you are feeling. i know that sounds silly, but the emotions of grief are so painful that it is tempting to run and deny them. allow yourself to feel them, and then perhaps you can get through some of them. you will always remember your Brayden, and love him because you are his mother. you have protected him the best way you know how, and he knows that too and loves you. i am so sorry you have not found support with your boyfriend, please seek it elsewhere -- your mom, a support group, here at bb, and/or a private counselor. all of these things can make the biggest differences when you are faced with the darkest days. big hugs to you, my dear, xxoom

  10. #28

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    Dec 2007
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    Australia
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    Thank you for your kind words. They mean so much to me.

  11. #29

    Join Date
    Nov 2006
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    Somewhere Over The Rainbow
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    Emma - huge hugs and best of well wishes for tomorrow. Sending you some strength to help you get through it.

  12. #30

    Join Date
    Oct 2007
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    Middle Victoria
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    Hi Emma

    Hope your day in Sydney goes well tomorrow. Sending positive vibes to you that you are able to remember and honour your boys the way you want to and you end the day feeling energised and full of love.

    take care,

    Kate

  13. #31

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    Emma, hope you doing okay today, darling. Thinking of you xoxoxo

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