Thank you all for your thoughts and support.

I have spoken to a couple of people in my family about how their comments have been making me feel and they don't seem to get my point. My father plays dumb when I have discussed it with him, he ignores my comments and changes the subject.

My daughter's birth age is 14yrs but developmentally she is about the same as a 1-2 yr old, her understanding at times is the same as a toddler and occassionally appears to be age appropriate (it varies on the circumstances and environment). She is currently diagnosed with Cerebral Palsy and an Intellectual disability.
Thank fully she has not heard any of the comments (While this is the main focus of conversation, I am avoiding haveing her involved in conversations and I am unsure how much she would understand/take in anyway), but she has been picking up how I am feeling and has become very clingy which she does when I am upset.
Her disability was why I adopted her, It was either me or institution style accomodation, which is not right for any child especially a child with her needs.

The new baby will not be treaded any differently by me because of the families attitude. The baby is not the one making the hurtful comments and who knows maybe by christmas when the baby is due to join us they may have realised and gotten over thier initial excitement.

Thank you.