Thanks.

I spoke to the health nurse again and she said if the hearing check doesn't show up anything ear-wise that might be causing a problem then the next most likely thing is night terrors. I don't know much about them. Seems to fit though, waking up screaming and she won't go back to sleep unless I am holding her/sitting next to her. I hope not because it doesn't sound like an easy thing to fix

I tried the no cry sleep solution baby book with no success when DS was little. The health nurse is going to get me some sleep printouts, she is really helpful so I am hoping we might be able to come up with something.

MadB, yes, the CIO is making her separation anxiety much worse during the day. I just don't know what else to do - she is going to scream unless I am right next to her and I just can't manage sitting on her bed from 1am onwards. Don't think books or talking to her will have any effect, she just doesn't understand. She understands here and now things but has no concept of something expected later iykwim.

Clover, I still have to sit next to my 4yo for him to go to sleep, as well as sitting by him once or twice a night to resettle him when he wakes. I sit by DD to get her to sleep initially and would have been happy to sit by her for resettles until this recent mess when she won't let me escape!

It is just so frustrating!! I can't believe how bad my kids have been sleep-wise. It can't be just bad luck, I am sure it is something that I have done. Maybe they don't have the right nature for excessive comforting because it all seems to have led in a downward spiral.