Why should you have to leave your kids with someone just to make THEM happy? Sorry, there is something really wrong here, if you are not comfortable with your ILs babysitting, then frankly they shouldn't be babysitting - sure they might be a tad offended, but seriously if you are concerned about the level of care your toddler or baby will receive then dont do it

My Mum babysits for us because I feel comfortable with this arrangement, and can actually enjoy my time away from my DS as I know he is well cared for, loved and has my Mums complete attention. I can't imagine a time when I will be comfortable with my ILs babysitting, they have no common sense and don't show enough respect for other peoples parenting methods (they have shown this with my BILs kids as have disrespected direct requests regarding appropriate foods for their baby when they have baby sat my nephew and given him raw apple because they thought he wanted an apple as reached out for it - HELLO CHOKING HAZARD!!!!), also their house is very innappropiate for kids - steep cement stairs with no hand rail, lots of glass furniture etc. I know my MIL is itching to have DS by herself, but it wont be happening anytime soon - perhaps once he can drive

I'm all for family harmony etc, but why do you have to let your MIL babysit to make her happy when this will cause you worry? I think its perfectly appropriate to be selfish when it comes to appropriate care givers babies and toddlers

Naomi