I'm so sorry your birth experiences have been so awful kateo, and I'm very sorry you lost your precious girl.

Its hard when those advocating for what is in essence a very good cause are perhaps not as sensitive as they should be. I don't share the view that you should be able to dismiss other's opinions and not be affected by them, and I think we all need a reminder at times that while our message may be valid, the delivery could be handled more delicately. You can be as informed and educated as possible, but I don't believe there is a human being alive who doesn't question their judgment when things don't go well

You're absolutely right. There is a time and a place for medical intervention. And there is a time when we should listen to the decision others have made and just support them in it without judgment or comment, whether we would choose to walk the same path they have chosen or not.
This is so true.

I can't even begin to fathom your emotions and hurt, but please don't blame yourself, which I know as mother you always will. But it is in NO way your fault.

I agree with you too about listening to the doctors. They aren't evil and I'm sure despite the hundreds of bad experiences, no doctor was trying to act in the mothers worst interests.

I also agree though that they offered sometimes for the wrong reason, so how do we determine. My ob wanted to induce me because he was going on holidays....yes you read that right. Dh and I thought about it and said he hasn't given us a medical reason so we won't take up the offer. BB gave me the confidence to do that.

I do feel however that some people on her can be harsh and un-understanding, perhaps not intentionally but nonetheless we should all write with compassion because we don't truly know the person writing originally. It's unfortunate it's not always a level playing field in the sense of if we were to get aggressive about being against home birth or drug free (which btw I'm NOT against) we would be shot down and reported, but not so the other way.

Hugs to you Hun, focus on the amazing ds you have now and remember that one day you'll see your beautiful dd again.

Xxxx