thankyou for this post Kateo - I am so sorry you had to go through that, and I hope you can believe those who remind you that it wasn't your fault, whatever your decision was.

As I am still trying for my first, I cannot explain how important BB has been in teaching and explaining things to me that I would never have even thought about, but I too sometimes feel the strong opinions can cloud 'rational' responses to things. As a generally optimistic person, I feel that most Dr's are probably trying to do the right thing, but when I had a MC this year, in that short brief time I WAS pregnant, I was so confused about what I should/shouldn't do and who I should believe... did I want my FS to be my ob? would he have my best interests? the midwife at the hospital I visited, said on the tour that the bed in the birthing suite looked uncomfortable... she was sorry, but it was easier for them that way...., which put me off... i would never have even worried about that prior to having read everything on BB, I just trusted the Dr......... in some ways it's great that I now question things! but in other ways, i feel like I can't just experience getting pregnant and going through the motions of 'experiencing' something that happens in life... without all these additional anxieties ...

I know that its TOTALLY my thing! totally all about me, and my anxiety and taking on things that I needn't, but perhaps what you are referring to, is how I feel sometimes, when strong opinions change and alter the way others think and feel. We all need to be careful about being too strong in the way we speak and write things, because that can come across judgmental without even meaning too. Yes we all are responsible for our own opinions and making our own decisions, but we are also responsible for the way we share our opinions and views as well. We certainly cannot control how people 'take' the information we share, but we can be careful to say it in such a way that is kind and respectful.

I really do believe that most people in here have VERY good intentions, and really do want to advise and support each other - but just like life, we don't always get it right. It's nice to be reminded to be careful sometimes, and for that Kateo, I think this thread is really important. Thankyou.

I am so sorry about your angel baby xoxo