Hi Mel, welcome to BB.

I don't want to be overly emotive, so I'll just type a short reply. (Sounds of "ha!" from those who know how much I type here LOL.)

A lot of women trust people who don't deserve their trust. Women do prepare themselves for birth to some degree or another, some more than others. But the ultimate thing is - has anyone else prepared themselves for your birth? Obs and midwives don't, to many of them you are just another customer. Probably can't remember your name if it wasn't on the notes in front of them. Trusting them is something that you WANT to do, but really shouldn't. You should be able to trust your birth support to support you, but if this is their first time and they haven't educated themselves, they won't be a support.

I was very educated and not scared, and while I was left alone I had a wonderful labour. Enjoyed it even. My husband was very disinterested in labour and birth beforehand, so caused a few problems. My midwives were more interested in my notes than me, and wanted the Obs to be more involved (he was lovely, in hindsight, and really didn't need to be!). That didn't help. TBH, knowing a few of the local midwives, they really aren't that fantastic with homebirths. The best way to homebirth locally is to acknowledge you are doing this alone, the midwives will turn up towards the end of the pushing - or just after the placenta comes out. There's no rush or concern. If they do arrive, they want to transfer you 9 times out of 10 so they can go home.

You need SUPPORT PEOPLE who SUPPORT you - then you can do anything! Be that birthing or walking naked around the world. (Just two of my dreams there LMAO.) It isn't about being a first-timer or under-educated, it's about the support and care you receive 99% of the time.

Oh yes - and from me, this is a short reply! Hope it helped and good luck with your conception, pregnancy and birth journey.