I'm being cruel to her...

[xXHopeXx]

ah, my bad i assumed sth eastern suburbs meant sydney lol. (the world doesnt revolve around sydney Gemma!)

[xXHopeXx]

oh and KMN - i was actually MORE full (im pretty sure) when she had the hang of it, if not much the same as i am now.

my supply seems to have settled abit in regards to fullness, but i was never really full, and my boobs didnt go hard, they were harder, but not hard. i remember some of the midwives in hospy saying that isnt uncommon with larger breasted women.

i dont know if that reply helped? lol

[Babyluv]

Sorry Hun,
I'm on my iPhone, can't see suburbs etc.

[MantaRay]

Gem, hang in there hun. You are doing really well and it will get easier. I think you are on the right track with trying to calm her as much as you can before a feed. Sometimes just giving them a finger to suck on can help too. Also, there are some positions that work better for large breasted mums. It really can be harder at first. Maybe some of these ideas would help you - Australian Breastfeeding Association - Breastfeeding With Large Breasts.

Let us know how you go today hun

[xXHopeXx]

Well good news is we managed to get squeezed in to see an LC today at 12.30, so wish me luck! But the little bugger just had a feed so hopefully we can get her to have another one in an hours time :/

[aussienic]

It is tough in the very beginning especially as you are both still learning..

Have you tried hand expressing a little to get the flow going before attaching her. Relax take deep breaths and all that. if you are tense bub can pick up on that.

if you pick bub up when she is ready for a feed or maybe just before she starts asking (soon you will pick up on the hungry signs) and take very deep breaths and hold her close and hand express just a little then slowly get her to attach..

I hope everything works for you and you guys end up having a great breastfeeding relationship

[RhiChiChi]

Well good news is we managed to get squeezed in to see an LC today at 12.30, so wish me luck! But the little bugger just had a feed so hopefully we can get her to have another one in an hours time :/

Best of luck Gemma

[sloane]

hope your appt went well

[Miss E]

Sorry I haven't had time to read all the other posts, so forgive me if somebody else has said/asked the same thing... Are you using the nipple shield full time? If you're not I would just start using it all the time for the time being so you can get rid of the bottles and get her used to the idea that milk comes from mummies boobies.

I had lots of problems with breastfeeding due to inverted nipples and literally couldn't get DS to attach without a shield. At around the same time as you're at I just decided that if we were going to have any sort of breastfeeding relationship it would have to be with shields. Over the next couple of weeks we both got used to everything, then when he got 12 weeks I was able to gradually wean him from the shields because his mouth was that bit bigger, his suck was stronger and he had a good idea of what he was doing iykwim?

There's nothing wrong with using shields if that's what makes you able to BF hun, I know they can be a PITA but they don't necessarily have to be forever either. GL x

[xXHopeXx]

Well the appointment seemed to go well, she actually attached well (ish) enough to get letdown and have a good feed and sleep!

She suggested that I try compressing my boob while she's on, as letdown seems to be taking too long (whether its because she's fussing or what, we don't know) and keep trying without the shields.

But when we got home and she woke for a feed, it just didn't work for us again I tried doing the same things we did up there, bar one of the holds, because by that time she was too stressed, and the LC said if that happens to give her some EBM and try again next feed. So alas, it worked when she was here, but not when she wasn't fingers crossed I can get her to settle, as were having trouble settling her atm, and we can try again next feed...

she's a little bugger, shell behave when the people that can help us are around, but won't when they're not!! So frustrating! What can I do!?
Not to mention the LC thinks were overfeeding her when we give her EBM (which we thought too) and has said we should try cut back on the amount we give her as she keeps vomiting up some of what we give her... But try telling that to a "hungry" baby after they've had their allotted amount! Lol


Miss E - we are using the shields full time - or we were when she would actually feed from the breast, the plan was to just feed with those, and keep trying her without them now and then, and hope that as she gets bigger, it gets easier for her.

Aussie Nic - we have tried hand expressing but til what I thought was letdown, but I dont get any "signs" of it, so it's hard exactly to tell if it is? But will keep trying at it, maybe I just need to do it that bit longer?

[aussienic]

Sometimes let down can take a little while, maybe massage your breasts or breast depending on what side you are about to feed on a little while before she is ready to feed. also once she is attached does she feed well cus I was thinking maybe once you have let down it might be too fast? With my DS3 i found I had this problem so once he was attached and we were both comfortable I would lean back in the chair so the milk had to go upwards kwim??

[Kmn]

When you bottle feed her stop and start a few times during the feed and give her little breaks - like a boob will. And please remember that most LC's have attached thousands of stroppy babies to thousands of boobs - so it will probably work better than on your own, at least at first!

[Lily Dust]

Its a bit of a step that she had a feed on the boob, so be it with the LC! You have seen her do it and it WILL happen again
Running your fingers from the top towards the nipple can apparently assist in letdown too. Im sure someone else can clarify this, but I dont know that breastfed baby can be overfed perhaps is different if its EBM.
You are going fantastic, your still trying and you will get there because you have the determination and the want for it

[Isadora]

I really feel for you, as this was me a few weeks ago! Its horrible and stressful.

For what its worth I dont think your DH was saying what he said to have a go at you, he is obviously stressed and frustrated himself. I know my DH, although encouraged me 100%, was stressed too seeing me struggling with breastfeeding, when he knew its what I really wanted to do and really its what they want for their babies as well.

I'm glad you saw the LC and had success. If you need to go back make sure you do. The LC I saw worked wonders for me, honestly if it werent for her I would have given up.

Also I had a few people say to me stick it out to the 6 week mark, you will be suprised how it all falls into place. And it really has (touch wood). I hope you can make it, I know you will, just take it a feed at a time. You are doing so well, and well done for seeking help.

[willow5]

Im sure someone else can clarify this, but I dont know that breastfed baby can be overfed perhaps is different if its EBM.

I thought the same thing^^ But then I'm no expert either.

YAY for the good feed though If she can do it once she can do it again! Keep up the good work You're doing great.

[MantaRay]

That's good news that you know that she can go on. Being confident that you can do this is one of the keys - you can do this hun

If your DD is vomitting after the bottle, she is not still hungry. It is most likely that she wants to suck and the behaviour looks like hunger (it's confusing isn't it!!). You could try her on the breast once she's had some EBM or otherwise try and settle her by holding her or wearing her in a sling. I am reluctant to suggest a dummy until you have breastfeeding going well, but maybe she could suck on your finger for a few minutes after the bottle if she wants to suck.

You are making progress hun and you will get there. Perhaps today you might like to hold her skin to skin when she's calm and not due for a feed and just see what happens. Often when there is no pressure to feed babies will attach well. GL.

[Kmn]

Gem - you were worried that your bub wouldn't be hungry when you went to the LC, but she fed better than usual.
Maybe you need to try and attach her between feeds - when she's not uber-hungry, and see how you go.

[xXHopeXx]

Hi all,

Last night we actually had a great night!! she fed from ME all night!! And we were able to do it lying down with minimal fussing!! DH said he didn't even get woken last night when she was feeding, I was so relieved as he has his testing for his Paramedic Application today and had to be out the door at 6.30am to be in the city for 8.30 and it's a 6 hour test!!

So I'm VERY pleased with that! In the morning as DH was leaving though she got alot more fussy and though she was sucking and feeding, she was crying alot and the feed was taking over an hour and a half and she was too fussy, so I topped her up with EBM, and though she STILL seemed hungry, I put my finger in her mouth and soon enough she went off to sleep


Aussienic - when she actually gets let down, for the majority she's fine, it's only once she's half asleep that occasionally shell cough but she doesn't like stopping and will often suck through it lol, she's a guts! But she can generally cope well with it. That's what we think/thought initially too that once she gets letdown, it's abit fast for her, but people say she's coping, so to leave it sorta thing

Lilydust - it's not so much that were overfeeding her, but more were giving her too much too quickly and at once and it's stretching her little belly too much and causing her to vomit and be unsettled. Which I'm tending to agree with, she is alot more unsettled to get off to sleep on the bottle and has alot more wind, but were getting better with that as we both have more practice


Isadora - yeah that's exactly how DH was, and especially seeing as it was 2am and we were all extremely tired and frustrated and just wanted sleep. He really is trying to keep us breastfeeding and encouraging and helping in every way possible, but he also let's me know that whether she gets my milk from bottle or booby, she's still getting it. So he's also helping me realize that I'm not a complete failure if she won't attach. But the LC said yesterday she thinks with time it WILL work because DD WANTS to attach, and tries her little heart out and has that determination, it's just a matter of time til it clicks better with her.

Mantaray - after I read that this morning and she was still acting hungry after nearly vomiting (she half gagged) after having EBM and booby, I tried the finger in the mouth and it worked! Took her a few mins, but she went off to sleep it's just a matter of trying to figure out when she IS actually full rather than waiting for her to vomit and then realizing lol...
The LC suggested the skin to skin too during feeds, she however thinks that my nipple may be too short for her and isn't clearing the hard palate, hence why she won't attach and suck properly without the shield. But we will keep trying. She said once DD gets bigger, that problem will fix itself as shell have a stronger suck and can pull the nipple further back.

KMN - she was actually starving at the appointment, as she vomited quite a bit before we left, I actually had to sit with my finger in her mouth for over half an hour til the LC came so she wouldn't be screaming the house down, and the LC could still see her trying to feed lol. Maybe she feeds better when she IS starving! Lol... It wouldn't surprise me, this child seems to be breaking all the rules!

Thank you so so much again everyone for your contintinuing support, it really REALLY does mean so much and gives me hope that we
WILL succeed and get through this....