Minny - I cried the night before DD1 turned 2 in August - just because it is still so painful to think about it. Even though I've had a successful VBA2C - it hasn't taken away the pain from my failed VBAC.
Thank you for this thread girls. I am aiming for a VBAC with this bub. I'm only 14 1/2 weeks, but I'm already nervous about it not working. I have an umbilical hernia and my muscles are separated half way to my ribcage already. I don't think I knitted properly after DS. I'm nervous it will be another big baby. I've already decided I'm not booking a cs until 42 weeks, I don't want continuous monitoring, I don't want an ARM - but everything I didn't want last time, I got.
So thank you guys for sharing your stories. I know there is life afterwards if it does not work - and funnily that makes me slightly more relaxed and possibly have a better chance at the VBAC. I sincerely hope I get a VBAC, but if I don't, I will know that I am in good company of wonderful women and mothers. Thank you.
Good luck, the psychological battle is much harder than the physical one, if you can get into a caseload program or something that offers continuity of care, so that you have the same midwife all the way through that makes the world of difference, not knowing who you will get on the day you go into labour, what their views will be, and allowing yourself to be subjected to the silly rules like not labouring for more than @@@ hours (arbitrary depending on the hospital and ob, but generally between 6 - 9 hours) not going over 39 weeks, big baby, needing constant monitoring, for are all obstetric myths and not grounded in any actual medical reality, I still challenge obs to give me a single reference to support any of these, and have never managed to get one who could give me a decent answer. With my 4th baby (1st and 2nd were emergency cs, 3rd natural in caseload at sunshine, 4th homebirth with midwife) my midwife checked his heartrate with a handheld doppler in between every second or third contraction, as it is the heartrate in between that counts, it goes haywire during contractions and that is a normal reaction to being squished and squeezed and born, .....
anyway, having a single and constant caregiver makes all the difference, then even a CS is in your control, and the midwife will be there to support you and make sure you can hold your baby straight away!
Knowledge and looking within, your body is amazing. I know, I birthed a 10 pounder with the 3rd, and then a posterior baby who came out brow presentation with the 4th, no probs with scar, and no probs at all. I couldn't have done that without my midwife though, I would have been worn down, scared, and given in to further CS, oh, and my muscles were separated after the first, and that was not relevant at all, it just means that you might carry forward, it has no bearing on labour or birth at all, PM me if you like, and good luck!!
Kate
Good luck, the psychological battle is much harder than the physical one, if you can get into a caseload program or something that offers continuity of care, so that you have the same midwife all the way through that makes the world of difference, not knowing who you will get on the day you go into labour, what their views will be, and allowing yourself to be subjected to the silly rules like not labouring for more than @@@ hours (arbitrary depending on the hospital and ob, but generally between 6 - 9 hours) not going over 39 weeks, big baby, needing constant monitoring, for are all obstetric myths and not grounded in any actual medical reality, I still challenge obs to give me a single reference to support any of these, and have never managed to get one who could give me a decent answer. With my 4th baby (1st and 2nd were emergency cs, 3rd natural in caseload at sunshine, 4th homebirth with midwife) my midwife checked his heartrate with a handheld doppler in between every second or third contraction, as it is the heartrate in between that counts, it goes haywire during contractions and that is a normal reaction to being squished and squeezed and born, .....
anyway, having a single and constant caregiver makes all the difference, then even a CS is in your control, and the midwife will be there to support you and make sure you can hold your baby straight away!
Knowledge and looking within, your body is amazing. I know, I birthed a 10 pounder with the 3rd, and then a posterior baby who came out brow presentation with the 4th, no probs with scar, and no probs at all. I couldn't have done that without my midwife though, I would have been worn down, scared, and given in to further CS, oh, and my muscles were separated after the first, and that was not relevant at all, it just means that you might carry forward, it has no bearing on labour or birth at all, PM me if you like, and good luck!!
Kate
Thank you Kate! You have no idea how good it made me feel re muscles separating etc I'm very lucky my Ob is very pro-VBAC (he's pro whatever Mum wants, but really, whatever's best for her - which is a vag birth!). He's happy for me to go 42 weeks waiting for labour (DS never fully engaged so don't know if I would have gone into natural labour at all, but there were other factors anyway), hasn't mentioned size of baby - although DH has, and we have yet to approach monitoring - but intermittent monitoring is just fine with me I wont be strapped to a CTG, even a mobile one.
Thank you again, it's still a long way to go, but I'm going to do it!
Hello all
I am feeling flat and feel I just need to share what's on my mind with someone, anyone that understands.
In 2004 I laboured for 3 days, posterior, obstructed poorly managed labour with over a dozen painful VE's which ended in scary c/s and massive infection 2 wks post op
In 2008 I tried for a HBAC cos the idea of hospitals freaked me out. I laboured for three days, baby went from OP to posterior and got obstructed, transferred to RWH and had another c/s. CS was very very scary with complications.
I have wanted a third baby for so long and I am feeling some stirrings and think I may be pregnant, I am 99% sure actually.
My birth notes clearly state "NOT FOR VBAC - SHOULD HAVE AN ELECTIVE C/S AT 37 WKS IN NEXT PREGNANCY".
It makes me ball everytime I see it.
Up until right now, this minute I believed SOMEONE out there would support me to attempt a VBAC and a baby I would magically push a baby from my vagina.
So I have two obs to go see (Euan Wallace & Harry McLennan) but my heart is heavy and I am anxious that they will look at my notes and just say "what were you even thinking come here with these notes asking for support, can you not read?!?".
So now I am wondering very very sadly, who will cut this next baby out and will they scare too much this time....?
I cannot talk to my friends, they are all very homebirth or stand-up-demand ad VB kind of people. They all think that all Obs are anti VBAC and my "complications" are all just scare-mongering. Maybe they are right, because my notes are scary. So much so that I think I might be so irresponsible for not signing up for an elective c/s.
Just so I can share this with someone out there, here is part of my notes. Many words I don't understand...
Don't feel you have to read it, I just wanted to share. I guess I want to know if this is really scary stuff or really quite common... sigh
EMERGENCY LSCS
OPERATIVE FINDINGS
• PA head 2/5th palpable
• No change in VE findings
• Uuerus - both tubes and ovaries normal
• Dense adhesions between all abdominal layers
• Ornental adehesions present which had to be divied to gain access to LUS
• Bladder edematous, advanced and densely adherent
• Baby in OP position
• Paper thin lower uterine segment
• There was a 2cm tear downwards on the right side about 2cm medial to the right uterine angle which was bleeding- sutured separately
• There was a suspicion of bladder injury (possible nick) hence Methyldene blue inserted into the bladder to test – BLADDER INTACT
• Blood stained urine prior to LSCS, clear after procedure
PROCEDURE DETAILS
• Abdomen opened through previous Pfannensteil scar
• Adhesions separated and abdomen opened with some difficulty
• LUS opened transversely and baby delivered by vertex after being pushed vaginally (someone shoved their fist up my vagina)
• There was a 2cm tear downwards on the right side about 2cm medial to the right uterine angle which was bleeding- sutured separately
• Suspected bladder tear hence Dr Peter Wein called in – methyldene blue test done and confirmed intact bladder
• LUS STITCHED IN 1LAYER ONLY AS LUS WAS VERY THIN AND WAS TEARING
• Complete haemostatis confirmed specially in separated omentum
• Abdomen closed in layers – parietal peritoneum closed after haemostatis
• Intra peritoneal drain kept in situ
Oh wow JoyMama - that was NOT a joyful c/s by reading it. I feel the pain just through reading your words. First off I want to send you an enormous Second, unfortunately, if that was my previous surgical record, I would be heading for a planned c/s. But I am a nurse, not a midwife, and I am not an obstetrician either. So not claiming expertise! It's definitely worth speaking with the obs you mentioned, I know Euan Wallace is pro-VBAC (quite high in RANZCOG too I think), and he deals with high risk births. He'll give you an expert opinion for sure.
You know absolutely (having two kids via c/s), that no matter how they come out, you cannot possibly love them any more than you do. I hope that if it turns out you cannot try another VBAC, or choose not to, or have another emerg c/s, that you can come to terms with all of it and know that you did everything possible for your natural delivery.
Sending you lots of love and babydust. Big again - I hope you find a great Ob who you can trust to provide you with the information. That relationship is key I reckon.
Thanks so much for replying wannabe. I appreciate your take on it, I have never really looked at the notes. Now I am facing reality.
I have an appt with Euan Wallace on Dec 7 and I just hope he is gentle with me. I am expecting that I will be having an elective c/s, but that just makes me feel really sick and scared.
I wonder if anyone here can recommend an obs who supports gentle c/s. mine were very rough.
Thanks again
I had an emergency c/s with Dennis Price and it was a really positive experience. He was gentle, I recovered REALLY well and DS and I were 100% healthy. He practises out of Malvern and delivers at Cabrini, Jesse Macpherson (Monash) and Mount Waverley Private. I find his matter-of-fact manner really reassuring, and he's out for the best outcome for Mum. Also pro-VBAC (supporting me to 42 weeks at least).
If you do go with a planned c/s, perhaps it's worth getting some counselling beforehand so you aren't so afraid. One of my best friends had an horrendous experience with an emergency c/s with #1 and has just had a planned c/s. Her recovery has been heaps better, and the experience was just a complete 180.
Thanks again
I wonder who you would suggest for counselling? I have seen counsellors over many years (with PND) and none of them really got my birth issues.
I wouldn't be able to recommend any specifics, however, I'm sure there is a birth support network that can suggest people who specialise in that area. Hmm... there's a disappointing births debrief section on here I believe, perhaps someone there could suggest someone, or a network to contact. Otherwise I'd be consulting with your GP to refer you to someone appropriate. Alternatively, an Ob might know of someone you could talk to?
Good luck chicky! The kids are worth all the heartache aren't they.
Joy Mama- I think Rhea dempsey is a doula and birth educator who does birth debriefing. google her. She is in Melbourne somewhere. I can't possibly interpret the whole of your case notes, but having only had one layer of suturing is not a positive thing. It is associated with a higher rate of rupture than double layer suturing from what I have read..... sorry honey. I hope you have a positive and empowering birth next time round.
hi ladies, I am thinking I may too be in this forum next week I am 11 days over today. had attempted induction on thursday and friday with foley catheter which never fell out like it was supposed to, had a VE and was 2cm but still a little high up. Dr said he could break the waters but I asked to go home for the weekend and try again at 42 weeks. He was so lovely and said thats fine as it was already 3pm and he said that a c section in the middle of the night if I did not progress would be awful and I agree! so booked in for monday 7am for AROM. been having 30 second contractions on and off since then and a small gush of fluid this morning but thats it. I am starting to give up hope. Is there any suggestions? I just want to feel like I tried EVERYTHING before going under the knife so I have no regrets as this will be our last baby 99% sure if this.
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Second, unfortunately, if that was my previous surgical record, I would be heading for a planned c/s. But I am a nurse, not a midwife, and I am not an obstetrician either. So not claiming expertise! It's definitely worth speaking with the obs you mentioned, I know Euan Wallace is pro-VBAC (quite high in RANZCOG too I think), and he deals with high risk births. He'll give you an expert opinion for sure.
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