your reasons for having a c/s??

[sirenz]

hello everyone

I was just wondering what are the reasons for you choosing to have a elective c/s?

I am seriously considering c/s due to my anxiety attacks and mild agoraphobia, i just feel that i won't be mentally strong enough to go through labour and fear that it will harm my baby. I am not on medication at the moment to control it because i wanted to be medication free for my baby.

so if you could tell me your reasons or share your story of c/s that would be great.

did you regret choosing c/s? did anything go wrong? did people judge you based on your decision to have a c/s?

[aussienic]

I had a natural delivery first time round no complications.. the 2nd time I was told baby was big (he was) so when my waters broke we decided to have a c/s. We elected a c/s the 3rd time due to my 2nd son being ill at birth. I thought about trying for a VBAC this time but have decided against it. I don't regret it. The only thing I wish is that my babies could stay with me in recovery so thats what I will be asking for this time..

You have a long way to go yet. You can talk to people about your fears ect. I found both birth experiences had thier positives and negatives aspects.

This is only a decision you and your partner can make. Good luck

[lindie]

This will be a controversial topic here.....


After 2 totally natural births I had my first C/S because my son was diagnosed with a ventricle problem that can be aggrovated with a VB so that was my choice for my first C/S

Having my 4th baby and 2nd C/S in august, this time it is due to not having a great scar and a lot of scar tissue around my C/S site and this pregnancy is really close to the last C/S so not enough healing time for a VBAC


Good Luck, personally I think you should really look into what is performed with a C/S as I think you might find its going to be easier on your condition to have a VB with a lot more freedom...

GOOD LUCK

[Smoke Jaguar]

If you do your homework on VB, instead of focussing too much on elective C-S, you might find that you'll overcome some of the limitations you've placed on yourself with your anxiety condition. Theres another member here who had a VB and has anxiety, and she has come out on top and better than ever with her confidence in, well, everything! Yes, she was initially petrified, but she found the experience to be extremely empowering, and the pregnancy and birth shattered the myths she had about herself. She still has anxiety, but it's not nearly the problem it used to be.
Anyway, find out about the kind of birth you'd like to have, research it, find supporting literature and your reading should allay a lot of the fears that have been associated with VB for the last century
Good luck, whichever you choose.

[Adnil]

OK, here is my reason for having an elective C/S last time....haemmoroids. Totally different to your reason, but I have had a terrible time for years & years & the thought of pushing out a baby was terrifying to me. My OB was only too happy to oblige....

In answer to some of your other Qs:

did you regret choosing c/s?

TBH, yes I do. I really didn't anticipate the pain of recovery from a C/S. It was horrible. Much worse than I imagined. I also felt like I had missed out on something special. I know not all women feel this way after a C/S, but I do.

did anything go wrong?

No, it all went pretty smoothly - oh, except that Em decided to come 4 days before the C/S date so it ended up being done as an emergency C/S LOL.

did people judge you based on your decision to have a c/s?

Some did. Because of the personal nature of my reason, I didn't tell everyone why I chose it. I did feel judged. And for a while it bothered me. Now it wouldn't really. It's no-one elses business.

Now, having said all of that, I am now going for a VBAC with this pg. I still have the same problems as last time, but am looking at it very differently now. I want to be able to pick up my toddler when she visits in hospital. I want to hold my bub as soon as she is born instead of waiting hours. A C/S to me is just not what I want.

So good luck with your decision, I know my experience is different to yours, but I hope that sheds some light on my POV both before & aferwards.

[Aranah]

Sirenz, I'm sorry to hear about your anxiety attacks and agraphobia.

There are a few of us at the moment on BB that are suffering anxiety disorders whilst being pregnant. A few of us have chosen to medicate, and a few of us haven't chosen medication, all for different reasons. You can read about it in the anxiety and depression forum here on BB.

I just want to share with you that I too wanted to remain medication free for my baby, and I have left medicating till now, and I dearly wished I hadn't. I now can see that the affect of my anxiety on my body and subsequently the baby carries much more of a risk than the medication would have. I had a lot of pressure put on me by both perinatal phsycharists and OBs at the hospital and also my GP to take the medication, but I refused. I am now seeing the consenquences of that by being so close to having the baby but not feeling overly stable either. I wished by this stage I had been on medication and it had kicked in by now and I could be enjoying the end of my pregnancy, and having much less of a risk of PND again.

For me, the opposite is true. I have a real fear of needing a c-section and there is a possibility that I will need one in my case. I have had uterine surgery before and it was dodge so they are concerned about the internal scar being compromised, and also I am apparently having a huge baby but I am a small person. Either reason for me isn't good enough as yet to have a c-section. I have been through natural/vaginal birth twice before and had surgery as well in that area, and the birthing (even without drugs) for me was much much easier to cope with than recovering from the uterine surgery. I think having a really good look into both sides of the coin regarding childbirth is best. You may not cope as well with surgery as you think, it's a major operation and carries many risks in itself to you and your baby. There are situations in vaginal birth too that can be hard to cope with, and the 'unknown' factor of it.

There is a section here with many birth stories in it done by BB members, of both a c-section (some elective) and vaginal births. It gives you a good idea of both experiences. That might help you also making your decision.

I really can sympathize with the anxiety and phobias you are having, it's really rotten to have them in pregnancy. All I will say is don't underestimate yourself either, anxiety makes you do that, makes you feel way less strong than what you are. I have been getting a lot of counselling through the perinatal unit in my state which helps heaps and I encourage you that if you aren't already, to maybe ask about that and you can discuss all this with them as well. They are trained in helping you cope through pregnancy and when the baby is born, to cope with any and all situations that arise. It's really helped me and I think i would have gone totally crazy by now without it.

Good luck hun.

[L-net]

Hello Sirenz,

I'm really sorry that you are tormented by the decision to vb or c/s and that you are suffering anxiety throughout your pregnancy.

I have naturally laboured three babies and, not having experienced a c/s but working in the operating theatres, would choose to have a vb for all the reasons the other girls have said. I think the anticipation of labour is the hardest part because it is easier to focus on what you have to do when your contractions start, from my experience.

Having said that Sirenz, I am going to have my first c/s with my 4th child in September. My last labour has left deep emotional scars and I can't bear the thought of going through this again. I think you are totally justified in your desire for a c/s and this may work better for your anxiety pre and post birth. It really is a hard decision to process, especially if you haven't experienced labour before.

As far as other people's judgement, I think your friends/family will understand and support your decision no matter which way you go.

I wish you well in your decision and that you will come to a place of peace regarding it.

Lynnette x

[visitor2]

Hi Sirenz.

I have 3 c-sections.
My first c-section was a emergancy one due to me having pre-eclampsia and also my DD was breech still.
I had a choice with my DS and choose a elective c-section that did end up being a emergancy one a couple of weeks before i should have had it due to having pre-eclampsia again.
I had my third c-section this year and that was a elective one as they wouldn't let me have a VBAC.

Did you regret choosing c/s?
I did for my second one as i will never experiance a natural labour and now i have been told i shouldn't have anymore kids because i have had 3 c-sections. So if i had a VBAC for my DS i would have been able to go on and have another baby.

did anything go wrong?
They ended up having to make a cut like the shape of a T to get my last DD out as she was stuck.

did people judge you based on your decision to have a c/s?
Yes i have been told that i have never given birth because they say i have not had a natural birth and that i have taken the easy way out.

If this is what you are thinking of doing i would also think of the future. If i knew back when i was pg with DS what i know now i would have had a VBAC.

[Elektra]

I had an emergency c-section with my DD due to PE and foetal distress. She was really sick after she was born and has suffered permanent brain damage as a result of complications in late pregnancy/labour.
This time around we're choosing to have an elective c-section because I'm not willing to take the risk of something going wrong during labour again. Yes, I'm aware that c-sections don't always go smoothly, but the decision was made for our peace of mind, and it's the decision we're comfortable with.
After going through what we went through last time, I really don't care how I give birth, as long as the baby is healthy.

[Jodie259]

I had an emergency c/s the first time. After 12 hours of excrutiating labour and intentions of VB... my DS's back was on my back, and he wasn't turning. I was also a 'high risk' and both DS & I were in distress during labour.

So I was raced into surgery, and in minutes DS had popped out and after a cuddle, he and DH went off to get cleaned up and weighed etc. I stayed on the table to have a cyst cut off my ovary. I had a brilliant ob, and my recovery was incredibly fast. Next day I was up and walking around; and I never took any pain meds because I never felt any pain. So my cs went perfectly. Great recovery, invisible stitches (I think they were staples as I never had to go back for removal ??), and no pain afterwards.

On the other side; my friend had a VB and they had to use forceps. She had 30 stitches "down there"... and was not able to walk for 2 weeks!! She was very fit & 26yo (I was 38yo and nowhere near as fit as she). Not trying to scare you from VB - as 99% of VB's go perfectly well and there can be complications whichever method you choose.

But I'm pregnant again... and my ob said I could do a VBAC. But I'm not so keen on it. I'm scared of the pain. I'm scared of the stitches (down there). And at 40yo, I'm not worried about the little scar in my pubes! My first appointment with my ob is in 2 weeks and I will discuss it with him. But I think the memories of my first labour (which was numbed with 2 epidurals eventually)... and the women who are honest and say how painful VB really is... is enough for me to consider CS again.

I find more people "judge" me because I wasn't able to breastfeed. I had absolutely no milk... and still total strangers give their 2 cents worth and suggest what I should have done!

At the end of the day - it's YOUR choice. It's YOUR body. You shouldn't be judged by other people - and if anyone judges you in any way - blow them off. Don't EVER worry what other peoples opinions of you are.

Try to talk to as many people as possible, particularly your doctor or Ob or midwife who you are seeing. There are people who have extremely painful VB's and CS's. Other people breeze through VB or CS. Recovery differs for everyone too. So there is no guarantee on either.

[Smoke Jaguar]

Sorry people were so judgemental of you, Jodie! It's not very well known about, but I also know of someone whose milk just did not come in after she gave birth.
As for women being honest about pain in VB, it's not about honesty, it's about personal experience! I did not have what others describe as pain, let alone any stitches or tearing (I had minor grazing only), so that's my honest recounting of my own experience, and I know others who are the same. Don't worry, I also know of plenty of women who were scared and ended up experiencing loads of pain and tearing/stitches etc. Mine was also a first time birth, so it's not a popular experience to talk about with other women who have 'been there, done that' and had nowhere near as nice an experience. For me, it was what I made it - I know people with higher risk don't have the luxury of 'making of it' what they want from it. But we're talking physical risk, not psychological risk (age, pre-eclampsia, etc).
Research, research, research, is all I can stress! Do your homework and you WILL feel more in control, even if something happens that is out of your 'control', at least you will know what is happening

[PlonkeeMumma]

HI Sirenz.

It is a hard decision and one that will have positives and negatives whichever you chose.

I had an emerg c/s with DS1 after being induced, having a 20 hour labour, forceps and DS not descending at all. I had an elective c/s for DS2. My ob first told me i HAD to have one then later said i could try VBAC but that i woudl be monitored constantly and therefore 'tied' to the bed so i thought i would end up having an epidural again due to not being able to walk around so thought stuff it im not risking going through all that agin and having another emerg c/s. i have to say that i had alot of scar pain when i fed after my emerg c-section which left me in a mental state so i gave up bf feeding him after 2 weeks. After my elective c/s i had no scar pain on feeding so am still bf at 10 months. I have to say i was up and about the next day and felt amazing after the elective but not so much with the emergency.
I don't regret my decision but i think if i had known about this website and had got more info about vbac and had known that there really was a choice of how i gave birth i might have tried vbac. There is alot of support and info on this site about this so you are looking in the right place!
Some people do judge me when ive said ive had 2 c/s and not had a natural birth and sometimes i have felt the need to justify that i wasn't 'too posh to push' and that i had been through induction, 20 hours labour, forceps etc.

In the end its about the bub in your arms not about how they get there. I have an amazing bond with my second child right from holding him the first time(my 1st one also but not from the start) so i don't think c/s affect that side of things.

It is a very contentious issue and only you can decide but whatever you decide don't feel guilty, just enjoy your bub.

Good luck and i hope your anxiety decreases with the more information you can find.

take care and enjoy bub.

Julie x

[AnyDream]

Hello, I typed a long response then decided that describing my experience in detail was not really helpful. Suffice to say, I don't believe my body is wired for birth as I had weeks of excruciating contractions that were never effective enough to birth my baby. I ended up being chemically induced (in a very poorly managed fashion) at 42.5 weeks and had a long and traumatic labour that left me post traumatic stress disorder.

Having said all of that, I still support vaginal birth as the best option. I just don't believe my own body can do it without all the other intervention, and I'm not prepared to have that sort of experience again. But my experience is fairly rare, most women are able to birth their babies and come through the experience euphoric at their achievement.

I just wanted to put a word in for hypnobirthing. It is a very powerful tool for managing your fear and pain, not just in labour but by practicing right through the pregnancy. I'm currently investigating my options for learning this to assist with the CS process (as it is by no means the easier option, being a major surgery that takes weeks and weeks to recover from).

[*noni*e*]

sirenz
firstly congrats on being off the meds because i know what thats like, i have bipolar as well as anxiety and also want to do it for the baby..
secondly i have not had a c/s as this is my first baby but i just wanted to say that my dp suffers agoraphobia (we are an interesting couple haha) and i was just thinking that it would probably be really beneficial to slowly introduce yourself to the hospital your going to... idk how bad ur agoraphobia is but familiarizing yourself with the hospital and the different departments slowly at a pace your comfortable with early on will make it much less of an anxious occassion when you do eventually have to go in...
as for having a c/s the thought has crossed my mind but i do feel that with a vb i will be more in controll and feel more comfortable with that thought as well as i know i will have my dp there to help me, do u have a good support person who knows you well??? as well as dnt forget if you are having a hospital birth i am sure the midwives or your ob or whoever is with you will spot it if ur in trouble and you could have c/s as a last option if u wanted to?
its totally up to u and all the best of luck whichever you choose and congrats on the no meds again great job

[Kirsty77]

My second c/s was elective due to me having gallbladder attacks about 3-4 times a week. It was my decision and I have not ever regretted it. Its your body hun so its your decision. Don't ever let any one bully you or make you feel bad for having depression and choosing a c/s. Yes you can do all the research possible, but ultimately you do what you feel is right. There is no right or wrong decision when it comes to your mental health.

Goodluck hun........

[sirenz]

thanks everyone for your replies, it was very interesting to see each point of view.

It is extremely hard for me not being on my meds because i am now finding it harder to leave the house. My condition is pretty common, but not many people understand unless they have experienced it in some way themselves.

An anxiety attack to me feels like i am about to die, i can't breathe, i hyperventilate and i get extremely dizzy and throw up, and basically i fear the worse will happen. I just feel that experiencing these symptoms during labour is going to be worse for the baby and for me. I know for a fact that i will still have these symptoms wether i choose c/s or vb, but i feel that if i choose c/s the anxiety will be relieved faster than say if i was in labour for 30 hours iykwim.

one time i had a panic attack that lasted 2 days, eventually my dh couldn't take it any more and he carted me off to the psyc ward and i have been forever thankful for him saving my life that day, as i couldn't handle it anymore and thats when they put me on medication (zoloft). I had suffered with this condition for 10 years without getting help and in the end it all became too much.

I guess what i am trying to say is that i know for a fact i won't be able to handle the 'unknown" factor of birth and i feel it is safer for me and my baby to opt for c/s. I know it sounds like the easy way out, but believe me, none of this is going to be easy for me no matter what i choose.

[Adnil]

Oh Sirenz I think you are brave & wonderful for thinking all of this through before hand d& acknowledging what you are facing. I can't imagine, it must be very frightening.

I don't think for a second that you are 'taking the easy way out'. Don't ever let anyone make you think that. For one thing, there is no easy way out, but mostly, you are putting yours & your babies health first, and that is admirable & sensible.

I hope the experience does go well for you, or at least as well as it can. Surround yourself with supportive people & stay away from anyone who will make you feel lousy. It sounds like your DH is a great support, that's excellent.

[nelliesbelly]

I deeply empathise as I have been considering ceasarean also due to a history of chronic fatigue. this lasted 3 years and in that time i almost lost my job, husband, home and sanity.

I discussed the options with my Dr and he supports my choice for C/S. Most people warn me of the extended recovery but I feel I know my body better than anyone and feel that C/S is best for me despite the longer recovery. I can understand it sounds strange to everyone else but I had three operations during the CFS and I was OK. One of the operations was an emergency procedure to open me up as they didnt know what was wrong- that was 15 stiches. Probably not as bad a C/S but I still feel I am capable of this. What I worry about more is the stress my body will be under with a long labour and the stress/anxiety of not knowing how my body would cope. I also have a history of high bp and palpitations, and pre-eclampsia in the family (my own mother had this with me). When I initially spoke to DR at start of pregnancy I would start shaking when I told him it stressed me out so much and I would cry thinking about it. At this stage I just want to be a good mum for my baby and I believe c/s is the best way- even though I am going to experience more pain after and it is scary and people judge me. My baby is the most important thing to me and I dont trust my body to safely deliver him naturally and I dont want to relapse into CFS after a hard birth and not be there to care for my baby. I have my partner taking 5 weeks off and my mum 2 weeks to help me also.