CL - give the Family Relationships Advice Line a call. they are there to get you in contact with the right people for this sort of advice locally, and can get you on to a parenting advisor or family relationships centre. they are set up to do what is in the best interests of the child, and can draw up parenting plans based on that - and whether your child is young or not, they will take into account her emotional well being if it goes to mediation - the parenting order might be drawn up to state that he is to have access a certain number of days, but that she doesn't have to stay over night...

i would honestly suggest a quick phone call to them will give more answers than we can! good luck sorting something out!