My parents had a rule when I and my siblings were growing up - let the kids sort out their own problems. I've adopted this - unless of course it is an issue that warrants serious intervention. I'll dole out advice if asked and leave it at that.

I am of the opinion that by time you interfere in your child's dramas they are over them. Let them do their own thing.

I remember when DS1 was younger and there were a few parents who were very hands-on. They got involved in every aspect of their child's life. One mother rang me to set up a playdate because she said that my son wasn't playing with her son anymore and she thought that we should bring them together away from the school environment. She was quite put out when I told her that my child could make his own choices about who he played with and when he played with them. If he wanted to invite X over that was ok. If X invited him over and he didn't want to go then I certainly wasn't going to make him go. I couldn't think of anything worse than having to endure a visit from someone who I didn't want to socialise with.

I really do like Rouge's advice in giving your child the tools to work through this.

Let your daughter know if you think that her behaviour is unacceptable. Teach her by showing her, not just 'telling', what is appropriate. If she comes to you ands asks for your opinion or advice, give it to her. Sometimes children just want to vent too. They might have had a fight with their friend and are just telling you about it to get it out. Just because they've complained about them doesn't mean that they don't want to be friends with them.

Lordy, the number of times I've whinged about my husband not doing or doing something I don't like....certainly doesn't mean that I'd want to live with out the gorgeous man!!

Anyway, I've probably gone off the beaten track a bit......

I truly hope that you and your daughter get through this soon.