MIL hoping for pregnancy news soon....

[Shanti]

Treetops - yeah it is a bit sad when you just get AF and know you have another 4wks until you can test again.... its such a very long time
You sound like you are getting the same thing in your life! lol its not a bad thing i guess people are just excited and want good news and i think ppl forget that it doesnt always happen straight away for some people....

I am seeing my sister in a couple of weeks and she has a 5mth old (shes 30) and fell first cycle and i just am anxious that she might say to me 'sooo, any exciting news for us?' or 'are you pregnant yet?' cos she says things how they are and says them outright so yeah i just don't know how to respond when people suddenly throw a 'sensitive' question in my face like that.....

I'm getting pretty good at just smiling and saying 'we're just enjoying life for what we have right now and whatever will be will be' even though deep down inside i am saying 'oh man, i want more than anything to be pregnant right now but hey $hit happens and i'm not one of the lucky ones that falls pregnant in 1 cycle!'

[briggsy's girl]

Ren - my mum was like this with my SIL - she'd ask all the time if SIL was pg - poor SIL was getting really stressed about it as it took them 9 months to fall pg with number one - then they announced their pg through their christmas cards - and mum was "too busy" to open hers for a while!

mum started the same stuff with us - and as much as i didn't want to tell them about the AC stuff, she pushed me too far one day so i told her bluntly that it wasn't happening and that she had better not question me again - i'd tell her when i was good and ready. it wasn't what i wanted to do - but i needed to get her to back off.

it's obviously different with your IL's as you have a good relationship with them - but don't let yourself feel pressured - if it's constantly being mentioned i'd just have a quiet word with your MIL and let her know that you're taking a while - maybe even mention your angel baby to let her know that this is a genuine struggle for you and that constant reminders can be painful...

[Shanti]

Thanks BG... I liked what you said at the end... I think if I am still getting the 'looks' and the comments after 2 more months, I think I will have to say something gentle like that to her.... mind you, she actually took nearly 2yrs to conceive their first son (DH's older brother) and she told me that a couple of yrs ago and i remember her saying that, so I'm sure she'd feel very supportive and be understanding aswell.... & she would know it doesn't always happen straight away!! Although before we got married she would say to me 'i reckon you'll be pregnant straight after the wedding!" and so i thought "yeah probably" haha WRONG!
My Mum doesn't mention anything, although I told her recently as she knows we're ttc, I told her I've been getting frustrated and upset about it and worrying something could be wrong and she said that it took her up to 8mths to conceive 2 of her 3 girls but I don't remember her ever telling me that, i remember her once saying it only took her 3mths or so so i think she's just trying to be nice there.....

ah *sighs* this ttc journey isn't quite as easy as I imagined it would be.....

[briggsy's girl]

it would be fantastic if it were as easy as the sex-ed teachers at school try to make you believe!!

both my brother and I were "oops" babies - from what i gather, my mum's siblings (all 13 of them) weren't really planned - and i KNOW both my nan and her sister were oops babies (my great nan was only 14 when she had nan...) - on dad's side, my nan told me she'd never had problems and none of my female cousins have - so it's making it a lot harder accepting that i'm having problems! the rest of my family get utd at the drop of a hat! i can certainly understand your frustrations

[Shanti]

Yeah BG that would make it even harder for you knowing your family members fell pregnant 'too' easily

funny you mention that, because i found out a few months ago, that not only did my sister fall pregnant first go, and she wasnt even really hoping she was just 'ah whatever happens' attitude, and then my aunty told me that she fell pregnant pretty much the night of her wedding (well, that was OUR plan too....we got married sept just gone) and my Grandma fell pregnant within 2-3mths with my Dad and I think someone else in the family fell pregnant pretty fast..... ALSO to add salt to the wounds, Mum told me a few months ago this was before we started ttc, that my sister had a 5hr labour, and so did my Grandma and my mum had short labours and so did someone else in the family so again, i'll probably no doubt, get the LOOOONGEST labour haha..... i shouldnt say that but yeah that'd be right if it happens that way hey!! lol

ah well *sighs again* we just gotta keep going don't we.... otherwise we may aswell just curl up in a ball.

[briggsy's girl]

ah well *sighs again* we just gotta keep going don't we.... otherwise we may aswell just curl up in a ball.

what? you're not already curled up in a ball? i been there for ages now

[Shanti]

BG my journey hasn't been as long as your's... :hugs: I do hope this is your year.... no, this is your MONTH for your long awaited well deserved BFP.

I do have to admit though, the last 5mths have felt like about a year.... a month normally flies by but when you're ttc, it doesn't hey....

and as for those teachers at school telling us how easy it is to fall pregnant, perhaps they forgot to mention the REAL facts about how long it can take for the average woman.... ggggrrr! Here I was thinking I only had to dtd once!!!!! lol all these years of being on the pill, I could have saved some $$$ lol (joking by the way)

[TreeTops]

Yeah BG that would make it even harder for you knowing your family members fell pregnant 'too' easily

Oh yeah, then there's that! My mum had three of us, and we were all unplanned.

For years my mum complained that my younger brother was conceived while she was using her partner's advice of timing unprotected sex according to her cycles. So I had it in my head that my mum was charting temps and CM to avoid pregnancy. The other day she told me that all she was doing was recording when her period was in her diary!! Silly, silly behaviour when she actually left her partner before finding out she was pregnant....she ended up getting married to him when she was 8 months.

My BIL's wife conceived her first straight after coming off the pill, which to begin with my MIL was pleased to discuss, but then when BIL and SIL were unfortunate to miscarry at 11 weeks my MIL told me she'd heard that becoming pregnant straight after coming off the pill could cause miscarriage. I soon corrected her that there was no proof to suggest that (none that I've seen anyway), and that all sorts of things can cause miscarriage. As it happened they did tests and determined that it was Turners.

Anyway, I digress. Yes, Ren it sounds like you have a good relationship with your MIL, and that it might be a good idea to 'share' with her if you're still unlucky in a couple of months.

[Heaven]

Oh God, IKWYM. My mum knows we are TTC and have been since July last year. She knows I will tell her as soon as I find out. So why does she have to ask every time I speak to her 'so, are you pregnant yet' and then when I say no 'sigh'. Well, I'm sorry!! I'm trying!!!! She was pregnant with me 6 weeks after coming off the pill. Doesn't mean it's that easy for everyone!!!!