reminders of if there are boundaries or communication that could help
professional help has never helped or changed the path in our life it was a waste of time and money. i am not prepared to do more courses or counselling for selfish kids. i didnt find it changed anything. only them moving out changed my life, or me deciding moment by moment how much i want to keep my distance or be involved.
some things dont get solved fast dont have hard and fast solutions
pointing out things to be grateful for may help
part of it is 'part and parcel 'and ' what we do' as one mentioned it, but it is sometimes more than what we do when the finances arent there to support older kids and its not even appreciated, and we do so much and yet its not even remembered. part of that might be normal, it still pretty horrible and denergising demoralising and draining.
some people/children are easier to get along with than others
some situations are solved more easily than others
other situations are negotiated or examined over time and may or may not have hard and fast solutions but nevertheless reaching out and hearing what others say or are experiencing may be helpful.
i ahve seen posts on other forums about such things and about how much it works fo rkids to contribute financially, so its something on the mind of many.
one common stats for sole parents is that money goes down and so does discipline as if 2 people reinforce something they are heard much more than when one person tries to reinforce something and carry all else alone aswell. and often the one who is there doing everything is the one who also suffers the most from lack of appreciation for so much they do or any other fall out of difficult or troubled children.
it could be only when they have to run their own homes and finances alone will they appreciate how much time and money is involved.
Last edited by sue1386; February 14th, 2010 at 05:15 AM.
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