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Thread: family who scrutinise every kg you gain...

  1. #19

    Join Date
    Mar 2007
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    7,167

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    grrr..........I hate this. I don't understand why people do it. I am not fat, I'm 158cms and about 52-53kg. Perfectly normal weight. Not skinny but not fat at all. Whenever I see some of my relatives they have to comment 'you like you've put on some weight' 'do you still have a pudgy tummy hidden under that dress?' WTF?? Why is it any of your business and why do you feel the need to comment?? If I wasn't family they wouldn't say it. If DH or I say anything to them about it they will just laugh and say 'oh, don't be silly, we're family'. Oh so that gives you the right to insult me?? BTW, they are definately overweight, how on earth can they comment??
    Well, I've been no help!! I have no idea how to stop it!


  2. #20

    Join Date
    Jan 2008
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    in my head
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    Hey - you've had heaps of great advice already Jules but I just wanted to say that family are supposed to be supportive (but of course we all know they don't always live up to this ideal! ). I guess if you can work out in your own mind what level of respect/support you expect from them, all you can do is ask for them to respect this (easier said than done sometimes). It is possible, (as already mentioned in this thread), that they don't realise how hurtful their comments are or how often they're making them. If the situation doesn't change, if they don't change, even after you've explained, you can't control them. All you can do is work out what you're willing to tolerate. It really sounds like your sister might not have resolved all her issues with food/weight/body image etc and is subjecting you to her stuff.

    Good luck! I hope whatever you decide to do, it works out for you.

    Also, I agree with Fiona - wear that work skirt whenever you want to! Don't let their comments limit or inhibit you!

  3. #21
    jules30 Guest

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    thanks Kaz. I will wear that dress again!!

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