I'm the type that can cope if I have to... mum went away to the UK for 2 months and I survived just fine.. just that when her help is here.. I tend to use it! LOL. So it's not really that I'd HAVE to have her help, but it is playing a part in my mind that it feels a bit selfish that me having another baby impacts her too. I don't think I'd actually let it stop me having another, but I kinda need to be reassured that it's OK to have some kind of reliance on a village. We have such a supermum mentality these days.. it's hard to let yourself rely on others.