Boys and girls ARE different, no matter what you do. Give a one-year-old girl a soft toy and she'll cuddle it, give a one-year-old boy a soft toy and he'll hit someone with it. Generally speaking, of course. We should celebrate this, not aim to make both the same, this usually involves saying the boy is in the wrong because cuddling is more acceptable than hitting - OK, I agree, I like cuddling more than hitting, but both children are discovering the properties of the toy and using it for what they like best - by design. Men are designed to beat up bears, soft ones or not!

My DS loves cars and trains. He also can put on lipstick and eyeshadow... not well, but he likes putting the brush in the powder and then almost getting it on his/my eyelids. I let him put his own lipsalve on when I'm putting on my facepaint.

DS likes pink... until he realises there's not a girl hiding in the pink! He associates pink with girls, and girls with hugging. He doesn't hug boys. That's not a learned behaviour, that's just him. He prefers to play with the toy workshop than the toy kitchen. However, at home he loads his nappies into the dryer (he likes tumble dried nappies LOL - he does this with ones on the airer, or even dry ones!), loads and unloads the dishwasher (not well, I admit) and pushes the hoover around (while it's turned off). He isn't allowed real tools, so plays with his plastic ones if he's not playing with mummy's kitchen toys.

The expectations I place on DS are that, as a male, he is to "look after" females. I expect that behaviour from all gentlemen, so that ladies don't have to be defended. He is to be polite, kind, considerate and, most of all, himself. He is not to beat others up (unless they start it, or they start it with someone weaker than himself, including with a girl of any size or age). I don't want to influence hobbies (he's a great dancer!), his school preferences, his job preferences, but I do expect him to be a gentleman. He is not to be a lady.