I think we've actually come to a consensus here - only posters don't read far enough in to see that consensus!

Can we add a post in, right before the first one, to say something like:

The current vein of the thread is as follows:
Mothers should be happy: not martyrs, but not ignoring the needs of their child. If the mother knows she is doing the best possible thing for her children in her situation and she is at peace with this, it is the best thing.

"Happy Mother = happy baby" is a statement too often used to just fob someone off without really listening to her problem or wanting to help, despite asking about it in the first place.
Does that seem about right?