I dropped my iphone on the baby's head last week while he was BFing because I was so wrapped up in a bellybelly forum thread. The pointy corner hit him. He screamed for 15 minutes.
I stayed up until 11 the other night (stupid) and slept in when DD7 had a sleepover friend. they trashed the kitchen. I mean- attempted cooking kinda trashed. It was crazy and there was stuff in the sink I didn't recognize. I cleaned it up for them without saying anything in the vain hope the sleepover kid wouldn't tell her mum about the lazy mum who didn't get out of bed with the baby til ten.

I left the old broken faulty dryer on yesterday afternoon while I did the school run. I weighed up the risk and reward and decided I'd rather the house burn down from the dryer sparking than DD7 lose her **** at 8:25 because her school uniform was wet. You'll be happy to know nothing caught alight.

I bought DD7 dinner from maccas last night because I forgot it was girl guides night and barely made it. She left all the nuggets and I ate them for my own dinner (so hungry all the time from BFing!) then told her after guides nuggets will get poisonous if you don't eat them straight away. She cried because I'd eaten her dinner so I went BACK to McDs on the way home (she decided she wasn't actually hungry and wanted a chocolate sundae instead.)

Hope that makes you feel like you're not alone. I tried to keep this a list of my most recent parenting errors ONLY. (Last two weeks.) I could type all day but only have 7% battery.