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thread: Homebirth General Discussion #15

  1. #181
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    Oct 2009
    Lalor, VIC
    5,051

    Oh, der, I should've thought of that - I didn't connect "peri" with "perineum" I didn't feel comfortable with anyone checking my stitches after Amelia, so I'm not sure I'd do it with this bub. Then again, I didn't know any of the people who asked so maybe I'll feel more comfortable if I need it this time?

  2. #182
    Registered User

    Jun 2005
    USA
    3,991

    I suffered trauma from being stitched after my first son was born so my MWs and I discussed it a lot when preparing for the birth of my second son.

    We talked about how to heal without stitching so I was versed on it but given the extra effort on being careful and having to lie down for so long I was keen to attempt stitching if I tore. We were pretty sure I tore as my son's shoulders were born so about an hour or so after birth my MW attempted to check but I was so sensitive and even trying to open my legs was hard and my anxiety started off. So she managed the briefest of glimpses and said she *thought* I had a second degree tear. If it was going to be stitched it needed to be that day. She said she really didn't want to do that to me and we went over the "rules" for healing without stitching and left it.

    The next day my secondary MW came for my check up and we decided she would check again as I did want to know that we had at least properly diagnosed the tear and I wasn't as sore and worked up from the birth so it felt like a better time to look (though, too late for stitches I think). She got me to do all the touching and it only really required touching my thighs to open up the view and she pretty much sat on her hands to help my anxiety and just had a look without touching anything. She confirmed the second degree tear and I continued with my "lie down for three weeks" and keeping it clean regime. Which got tedious but was actually a great thing to do post birth in any case My H took the time off work and did everything around the house and caring for our older son.

    I saw a physio a couple of weeks after birth as I wanted to review muscle separation. She's big on incontinence and wanted to poke around my vagina too. I told her she couldn't touch but I let her look. Anyway, she was shocked that my skin looked yellow and she was sure I had an infection from not being stitched. I called my MW and she asked me much better questions about infection like pain and smell and she said I didn't have an infection and yellow was perfectly normal but no-one knows what unstitched skin looks like when it heals. I think that's important to know if you choose not to get stitched. Don't let other people get you in a panic. My body healed perfectly. Never any pain, never any problems. I would do it same way in a heartbeat and will discuss the hands-off policy with a MW when booking them next time as I want someone again who is comfortable with that and knows what to do without poking and prodding.

  3. #183
    Registered User

    Jun 2009
    vic
    2,886

    Lol teni they would of done the assessment already if you already had the sutures in



    Due to my PTSD my MW knows to tread carefully there, so it hasn't been a problem for me thankfully.
    Last edited by Eenee; August 16th, 2013 at 12:38 AM.

  4. #184
    Registered User

    Mar 2009
    Sunshine Coast
    2,075

    I think I may have asked my Mw if she needed to look, she offered to wait, but I just wanted it over and done with after the birth. So that's what happened. She gently had a look and saw two 1st degree tears and that was that. It did hurt a bit, but she was gentle. One way to get an indication would be to look at blood loss I guess. But since we all bleed a different amount post birth, it might be hard to know what was lochia and what was from a tear. Dunno!

  5. #185
    2014 BellyBelly RAK Recipient.

    Aug 2010
    Over the hills and far away
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    I wouldn't have known that this is normal practice, as I too had stitches for 2nd degree tear at my hospital birth, so they were already down there.

  6. #186
    Registered User

    Oct 2007
    Middle Victoria
    8,924

    i think it depends on the midwife. it isn't my midwife's normal practise. good question to ask though in your birth planning meeting!

  7. #187
    Registered User

    Dec 2007
    Sunny Qld
    14,682

    My midwife with Eden did the check after she was born and OMG it hurt!!!! She didn't stitch though. My midwife with Sahti was more gentle (ie, didn't get her hand in there and wipe out with extreme efficiency!) and I had torn, but she let it heal naturally as well. Just had to keep my legs together lol

    I don't know what my midwife will do this time, we haven't discussed it yet, although I am seeing her today and we are going over birth plans apparently.

  8. #188
    Registered User

    Mar 2009
    Sunshine Coast
    2,075

    Hey girls, I am really slack getting a gf a motherblessing gift. I am away on holidays, so I need it to be something I can order online. She is a third time mum. First Hb, but she is a birth junkie and has videos lots of hb's. any suggestions? Something unique. And price isn't a big deal. I want to spoil her.

  9. #189
    Registered User

    Oct 2007
    Middle Victoria
    8,924

    a birthing pendant for a necklace?
    bunting or something funky to have up in her birthing space

  10. #190
    Registered User

    Jun 2005
    USA
    3,991

    I wouldn't have known that this is normal practice, as I too had stitches for 2nd degree tear at my hospital birth, so they were already down there.
    Surely they checked and knew you were torn before doing stitches though.

    Hoti- do you mean that your MW never checks if/how much you have torn? How do you decide on a treatment plan without checking? I'm not trying to sound facetious either. It's a genuine question

    Bella- Blissful Herbs? I love that stuff!
    Last edited by meow; August 16th, 2013 at 09:04 AM.

  11. #191
    Registered User

    Mar 2009
    Sunshine Coast
    2,075

    Oh yeah I got blissful herbs for my last birth. Good idea!!

  12. #192
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    Oct 2009
    Lalor, VIC
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    Ah, I keep getting people's meanings confused I thought you meant checking on the stitches/tearing a few days later, not immediately after birth Hopefully now I get it I had a few people ask if I wanted them to have a look but I turned them all down. I seem to have healed just fine.

  13. #193
    Registered User

    Oct 2009
    Bonbeach, Melbourne
    7,177

    I don't really remember the peri checks, aside from a vague feeling that they were uncomfortable. I've never torn or grazed though, so I'm sure that makes a huge difference as to the level of discomfort.

  14. #194
    Registered User

    Oct 2007
    Middle Victoria
    8,924

    Surely they checked and knew you were torn before doing stitches though.

    Hoti- do you mean that your MW never checks if/how much you have torn? How do you decide on a treatment plan without checking? I'm not trying to sound facetious either. It's a genuine question

    Bella- Blissful Herbs? I love that stuff!
    Yeah, i like the blissful herbs idea too. As a 3rd time mum, i know baby will be looked after. i have many books and dvds but things to make me feel special are so cherished.

    I didn't say she doesn't check. If the woman wants to, she will have a look, but it is not normal practise 'routine' to do so.

  15. #195
    Registered User

    Jun 2005
    USA
    3,991

    So, what is the plan of action without checking? Just lie down as much as you feel you need and if that feels like a lot then maybe get checked down the track?

  16. #196
    Registered User

    Jul 2005
    Sydney
    7,896

    My m/w barely touched me at all tbh, so I'm not concerned that she wasn't gentle. There was nothing internal and I only had a minor labial tear, nothing of note to mention. Since I birthed in the pool, blood loss would be harder to gauge and I'm totally fine with the reason. For DD2's birth it would have been at least an hour later. I think it's more that I didn't have any vaginal exams at all until then and the whole area was feeling completely off limits! I also didn't like delivering the placenta, completely psychological as I just felt my poor body had done enough to get that baby out as quickly as it did.

    I think I'll mention it again closer to the birth, but I think only to remind them that I didn't like it and to bear that in mind. I'm sure they will, both were so apologetic last time.

    I guess the plus side is that because they checked and it was all pretty much fine I didn't need any visual follow up checking at all.

    I'm into spring cleaning and sorting out the yard and pool so there won't be too much closer to baby time. But we're renting, so no need for renos.

  17. #197
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    Oct 2009
    Lalor, VIC
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    I keep forgetting that hospy appointments start mid-pregnancy and getting confused at people in my various "due in" groups saying they've just had their first appointment. How did I go so long (with Amelia especially!) without going mad? Actually, don't answer that. I just remembered, I was a bit impatient for my first appointment with Ianto, that was pretty much my first BB post

  18. #198
    Registered User

    Mar 2008
    North Northcote
    8,065

    yeah it is crazy how little the contact is within the hospital system...they certainly are not talking peri checks so early in...or at all

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