I would say not this time because you'd be taking him out of childcare then taking him back to go back to work; alot of disruption.

But I believe children should be allowed at funerals so they see a healthy impression of dying and death. Hiding them away from it does nothing but shelter them. But Im a bit liberal like that; we've talked about dying and things with our kids (DH deployed last year and it was something Ds1 brought up so I ran with it, because well there is a small possibility they'd have to deal with it with his line of work).

I think asking her family if it would be ok is a good idea.