Hi everyone, hopefully your weekend was nice. Both my DH and I worked on Sat so tonight's our 'sat nite' so to speak! I'm just about to go make dinner. My DH made our entre which was gyoza (dumplings) which were delish. Now I'm going to make glass noodles with prawns and chilli...yummmm! My DH's favourite.
Alice- I can really empathise with you. I've just had a collegue do her 1st IVF (after 2 IUI's), she got oodles of eggs on 66iu of FSH (!) and despite I really don't want others going through similar heartache to myself (logically), I was so (strangely) relieved when she recently got a BFN. Quietly, I felt SO guilty! I have a couple of friends who luckily conceived 1st go on IVF. It's great but so hard all the same. What a rollercoaster!!! It really is lovely to be able to express myself (honestly!) with you guys!
I'm going to try and do personals but i forget where every one is up to and I can't go back while I reply lol.
MurrayCod - I really hope that the cramping means BFP. I've got my FX for you.
Sevei - I know how you feel. I think it's a natural feeling. One of my co workers had a baby end of last month and my boss said that she wants to come in to work to print some stuff off or something. I don't think I'm quite ready to see the baby as yet but I have no idea how I'm going to get out of it.
Ferrals - I'm so sorry you got a BFN. When do you expect AF?
I know I missed quite a few of you and I apologise. I'll have to go back through and reply a little later while I'm at work.
AFM I'm CD3 today and 2nd day of clomid. Not much happeneing just waiting gor AF to leave the building.
Ferrals sorry about the BFN.Hope your not as many DPO as that and it is a BFP just too early to show. Sounds like you and Crafty must be cycle buddies. Crafty hope AF doesn't come.
Alice sorry to hear your brother was born under the lucky star. Wish you were there under the lucky star with him. It can be so hard can't it? My brother and ex bestie are due mid June not looking forward to that. Its their 2nd and 3rd in the time I have been ttc so seems so unfair that they can have successful outcomes twice in the time we can't even get 1.
Murraycod just have to add that I have a good feeling for you. Cramps aren't all bad at this stage actually if it was me I'd be excited as it would be around the time of implantation right? FX so tight that its a BFP in a week when you have your BT.
Sorry for the lack of personals. I was away camping for the weekend OMG the toilet was full of frogs. I though we were camping in luxury with a flushing loo but everytime you flushed it about 6 frogs came with it lol then I opened the cysten and there were like 50 in there.
Any how CD14 for me so the BD fest has commenced. Going to call the Dr today I have been avoiding it but now DH is going to if I don't so I better pull my finger out and do it and hopefully can get in for 2weeks time in which time either I will know I have a BFP (if only I could be that lucky) or AF is due so will be able to start the pill for our IVF cycle.
Where do i start i went to work yesterday prepared to see the pregnant skanks i work with ready to ignore them when an old work college came up to say hi and in the convo said so any news yet i said no she said she has her fingers crossed for us and said it will happen soon i just said i doubt it will ever happen (i don't know why i was so negative) while i was talking to her a male ex staff member came up to join the conversation and said oh what your still not pregnant my sister is for the 8th time i said good on her i don't care (WTF was i doing that was not nice) so they say their goodbyes i am left teary eyed but keep working then within 15 minutes my boys old preschool teacher came and siad hello i havnt seen her for a few years and in the conversation about my kids she says i am pregnant again i am not real happy i just had my 40th bday and was on the pill and only have one fallopian tube and the little sucker managed to get in there.
Well that was it i was pushed beyond what i could take i burst into tears and i was in the cashiers desk i couldn't walk away i still had to serve people they just came up to the window and looked at me like WTF they didnt know what to say i just cant believe so many pregnancy related comments i get why cant people just ask how have you been what have you been doing and if i want to discuss my inability to fall pregnant i will bring up the topic,
Needless to say my night was just frigging horrible.
Alice-thanks for the positive remark the only good thing that comes from my BFN is i will be doing IVF with some of you girls.
Did i tell you that it will just be normal ivf we are not doing PGD as it is to expensive so we wont be having the embryos tested we will just have to pray they pick a good one that is free from our bad gene but unfortunetly in our last PGD cycle our strongest embryo and the only one good enough at grade 2 to be tested was affected and we got pregnant with Abbi who was affected so to be honest it looks like the affected embryos seem to be stronger and do better so maybe we should pick a slow lower grade embryo.
And i know how you feel about your SIL if she gets a BFP it is so hard you want to be happy for people but deep down inside you hope it is a BFN i believe only because it is easier for us not to have to cope with more pain and disapointment if there were no pregnant people around me i would cope so much better.
The only people i want to see pregnant is the girls in here that i am struggling to ttc with.
My only funny BD story (well it was not the right BD time we were just fooling around before work yesterday )DH and i were have a great time getting into it when all of a sudden my DH daughter (who was visiting for the weekend comes to out bedroom door calling out puss puss puss come here puss puss i want to play and my DH says quietly to me daddy has his puss puss Well i burst into laughter so hard i was crying it was so funny i couldnt stop so needless to say it was very hard to continue because every time DH went to touch me i was in hysterics and then he started to lose his um! you know wind in his sail so that made me laugh even more so we gave up lol.
I did make it up to him when i got home last night.
Mildez-thanks hun but i doubt it.
Sevie-can i ask how do you know you have a poor ovarian reserve was it you FSH level or follicle count or response to ivf.
I discussed the option of donor ivf with DH either egg or sperm because we are both fertile it wouldnt matter which one but it would rule out our genetic fault so we would not have to worry about the 1 in 4 chance our baby had SLO but DH said no he wants our baby to be ours if we cant have our own baby he doesnt want one and i suppose i understand as we already have kids to our ex partners we just want one together that is made from us both.
I hope your ivf process speeds up a bit is it because of the therapy stuff and the wait to give the donor time to be sure they know what they are getting into.
Crafty-how are you going? my temp dropped to 36.16 this morning so if my cycle is like the last few months AF turns up 2-3 days after temp drop so should be here wed-thur.
Sunbeam-any news from you has AF turned up or are you still quietly hopeful?
Murrycod-I know you are stressed and being all negative and thinking the worst stop it!
Porshe-do you think clomid can help me get pregnant my cycles are normal i O every month but i have read that some women can still take it with normal cycles to help i am just wondering if there is other things to try before i do the whole invasive ivf road.
Well i think i have rambled enough sorry it took you all so long to read it i am stuck on the lounge with my furbabies on my lap so i cant move.
Have a good day it is my day off so i have housework to do Yeh! fun fun fun.
Mildez - don't know how I'd go peeing on all those frogs!! Ah that's too funny. Camping sounds great - really feel the need to get away atm. Enjoy your bding fest - hope you don't get too sore
Thanks for your comments (and Porsche) too - I was logging on to delete my post before anyone had the chance to read so thanks for understanding. If the shoe was on the other foot I'd feel so bad for them, and I would never want them to go through what we've been through. I should have known that you'd get it just hate feeling sorry for myself - it's really not helpful to me or anyone here. Sorry ladies!
MurryCod - how are you this morning? Are you back at work yet? Hope the cramps have settled down. Thinking of you x
Ferrals - are you going to keep testing just in case?
Crafty - any news with you? Are you and MurryCod going to test together?
Sunbeam, Sevie - hi and sorry if I missed anyone else.
Alice- i forgot to mention kit is still in there with a chance a heartbeat of 80 between 5 and 6 weeks is actually normal it usually picks up to 120 to 150 at the end of the 6th week so her scan said she was 5 weeks 3 days so that would be right but the bleeding is a worry so hopefully for her she is just a few days behind and the bleeding is just bub settling in.
Ferrals - we posted at the same time. Cracked me up reading your bding story - thank god we can still find things to laugh about - your DH sounds like a character. I'm sorry you had such a ****ty shift I don't blame you for bursting into tears, sometimes it's just more than we can bare. If it makes your male colleague think twice next time he opens his mouth then good. I have a friend who knows we have been TTC for a long time and she tells me about her friend who is struggling after two months and I said I don't care, I don't want to know about it and that shut her up. And I really don't want to know about it - not being mean just protecting myself which is what you had to do last night. Glad your furbabies are keeping you company and I guess you knew that your temp was going to drop just bummed out for you that it has. I've had the same convo with my DH about donor egg and he is the same - he wants our bub and if he can't have it think he doesn't want to go with donors but who knows he might change his mind after all fostering is someone else's kids and we've talked about that. Can you come clean my house? It looks like a bomb went off! Dad's visiting later this week so guess I'll get to it before then LOL. Hope you have an OK day today - I'm putting a mental shield around you that no more ungrateful skanks or relatives thereof or just insensitive people either ask you about or tell you about pg. OK - shield in place. If they come near you they will have a sudden urge to pee and rush to the nearest toilet. Then they will be disorientated and forget why they are there. I think that'll work. Looks like it'll be Try in July for a few of us and if only that PGD testing wasn't so expensive fingers crossed you'll get a good healthy one x
Ha cross posted again! And thanks for the post about heartbeat - that's reassuring. The thought of another mc after only having had one scares the life out of me, more than not falling pg again. She's been on my mind heaps.
Alice-Yeh i have been thinking of her to and i can understand why she is thinking the worst i just hope she is wrong.
And it looks like july is going to be the month for a couple of us to be doing ivf i hope WIVF can get me in my AF is due wed so there is no chance for this cycle so next AF should be around the 23rd of june i hope they don't want me to do the long cycle with the pill i cant take the pill never have been able to thats why SIVF put me on and antagonist cycle which was perfect for me but i have read that WIVF likes you to go on the pill to fit into their schedule which mean i would not go for EPU until the end of july anyway i guess i just have to wait and see what this new FS says.
I am going to concentrate on losing a few kilos before then i have 2.8 kilos to lose i want to get back to 62kg that is what i weighed before i had Abbi.
Crafty - I'm sorry you got a BFN think it's crap you can't get medical assistance - wonder if it is worth ringing IVF clinics in other states just maybe a FS might know someone who would help you in WA or be able to treat you with drugs inter-state? Clutching at straws I guess but it's just frustrating to read - my SIL is 45 by the way and she is going through Melbourne IVF so they must treat older women there. Would you like me to find out who it is?
Ferrals - I hate taking the pill too. My FS is pretty adamant he wants me to do it with this cycle but I really don't want to and the TCM doc agrees with me and thinks there is no reason why I have to take it so haven't gone on it - guess we'll have to have that convo with him soon and see if he'll change his mind. Are you still taking your chinese herbs? I have lost some weight doing the diet but it's full on as you know and not easy to manage. I'm around 63 kilos and would be happy to loose a few more but not too much as that's a good weight for me.
MurryCod - you're very quiet...are you OK? Are your kittens keeping you distracted? Sending you lots of love x
Alice- i am taking a few chinese herbs and coq10 but that is it i am wondering if i should go back on vitex because i stopped it leading up to my 1st PGD ivf but it was cancelled due to high E2 of 300 on day 1 so i went back on it and it went down to 187 still a bit high but ok to start i have done a lot of reading on high E2 early in the cycle it is ok for normal fertility but not good for ivf i read i can be bad for egg quality and implatation as it makes the progesterone level rise to early in the cycle and i always have high E2 early in my cycle hence the high reading on my CBFM on day 6 of my cycle the day after AF has left the building but i O around day 11 which is ok and my LP is usually around 14-15 days so that is normal god i have so many questions to ask my FS.
I just have this feeling something is wrong with my hormones even though my cycle is regular i feel something is different with my body.
Hi Girls, yeah I know I'm on the quiet side, I'm battling TBH, these cramps just won't let up, and leave me alone. Thismorning they were just buzzy and mild, but since early avo they have become quite pinchy and strong again. Every now and then, when I stand up, it's like I have a nasty stitch that prevents me from standing straight, then turns into AF feeling.
It is just keeping me from being positive. I've logged on like a hundred times today, but just can't bring myself to type anything.
Had a nana nap o the couch before, now have a darn headache,. I can't win! Enough about crappy'ol me.
Ferrals, darling I'm so sorry you had another rough night at work. I know exactly how you feel, I don't wan't to go back to work this comming Saturday, dreading it actually. I had hoped to be going back, knowing I'd be taking maternity leave soon, but now have lost hope of that. I remember how hard it was going back last time, I don't know If I can survive it again, wthout telling someone to shove it.
(how am I meant to look after sick people when I feel like I just qwant to tell them to get stufferd??)
"get your own bloody bottle you lazy old man!!!".....................sigh.................. .....
Crafty, you naughty naughty lassie you!!!! Thaught you were gunna hold out with me!!! T'is alright, huggs babe, I understand how hard it is. XXXXXXX
Alice my darling beutifull, you don't need to be sorry about how you feel, you should know, of all places you can have an honest vent, it's here X
My kittens are wonderfull thanks, I took some pics of them yesterday, so I will upload them when I get a chance....(cuz I'm like, so buisy kicking stones around the backyard!) I used to have chooks when I was a kid, I remember my little bro throwing one in the pool and Mum fining it, and bringing the poor thing inside to sit next to the heater...it always came inside after that....
Mildez, that's so grose having to pee on froggies!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I have froggs all over my fernery ATM, but they don't come inside!!!! Happy BD'ing to you!! Go catch that egg girl!!! XXXXX
Porche, hope the clomid does some tricks this try XX Hope you are well XXXX
Sunbeam, Sevie, hope you are both well XXX
Sunbeam any news yet hon XX
Take care all, I appreciate you all being here for me, I do drop in like a hundred times, I just feel a bit low X
Ferrals you know so much more about the hormones and what is good or bad than I do...you've obviously done lots of research and it's great to read so I can ask about it too, thanks x I asked my TCM about vitex and she said yes definitely take it if I want to so now from what you've written I think I will. I was on it in an earlier cycle in 06 but I read somewhere it's not good if you have endo but since I haven't had any recurrence of that maybe it is OK so I will try it. Kit said it takes 10 months to work but I don't know about that - time is such a bloody enemy for us - you learn one thing, then another, never in the order you need it in, it's a constant up hill battle of wondering why didn't I know that earlier? Does my head in!! I will speak to my FS about my E2 on day 1 - I've never asked or been told anything maybe it's OK I don't know. I do know my FSH is naturally high so that's why I don't get much response on 450 gonalF but ah well I have to work with what I have. I keep telling myself I only need one good egg...
MurryCod - Kicking stones around the backyard eh? Poor love it's **** doing this waiting isn't it? It won't be long til you are taking that maternity leave, I promise you! Think of this as a temporary visit to the workplace. You'll just have to use your super powers to banish all annoying people from you. I remember saying to someone once that just because they are old doesn't mean they are nice - I hope you can find a way of making the time go fast while you are there and all the pg nurses are away with flu! Hmm, time for another Indian feast or is curry out while you are waiting? I hope your DH is being kind to you (is he still on a high from your baker's dozen of blasties?) Try to get out of the house for a walk if you can every day, just moving helps the happy hormones and it's good to get sun on your head and remember there's a whole world outside your door. Hang in there xx
Murraycod still praying and hoping and part guessing its your emby making a home which is making the cramps. FX so hard for you. I didn't pee on the frogs just if you flushed they came flying out in the water lol then some would swim down the loo others would scurry back up the rim. FIL insisted his dunny didn't have any then I pulled the cysten of and they were eventwhere inside his also just not getting flushed down. Maybe flushing loos on a camp site aren't all they are cracked up to be after all.
Shame about taking the pill hey? Seems silly just to get in time with the clinic. I am not looking forward to that part as it seems like a whole month wasted. Oh well in the scheme of things what is a month when most of us are up to years now?
I've been having some pretty bad left sided pain. If it doesn't go away or gets any worse I am off to ED. Feel like doing a POAS just to make sure its a BFN (CD14) as if it was a BFP I would be sure I have another EP. GEe just want it to go away. Pain is completely different to my last ectopic have no idea what it is.
Hi Ladies,
I have been so busy have not even had a chance to read all the weekend posts so sorry no prsies but i'll have more time tomorrow.
Just wanted to let you know AF arrived today so hoping for a good bleed (last two months have been very little). I really want this to be my month because then no IVF plus when I had last MC I had a gut feeling I'd be pg again in June so
My friend sent me my stars for today, sounded pretty good.
Aug 24 - Sep 23 Virgo
Are you feeling lucky? You should be, for the planets now speak of a great blessing being bestowed on you. Careful, though. This may not involve the conventional idea of 'good fortune' involving a lottery win. Think instead about insights gained from new, deeper understandings; about relationships deepening, old fears being conquered; and fresh hopes being awakened. You are being taken out of something that's not so good for you and placed in a position where you can forge a much deeper, more secure and happier future.
Alice- if your E2 was high im sure your FS would have told you because they wont let you do a cycle with high E2 i do know that high E2 can also supress FSH levels that would explain why my first cancelled cycle i had a FSH of 8 but E2 was 300 and then the next my FSH was 10.5 and my E2 was 187 so i am terrified of my next lot of levels, they do say the older you get the E2 goes down and the FSH goes up but high E2 can also be a sign something is not right my Naturopath seems to think i am just really fertile lots of follies yeh well were the hell are they every month there is lots but they dont want to stick do they.
If you dont mind me asking what have your FSH levels been i have researched up the wahzoo on FSH levels and high E2 and i can tell you i wish i hadnt because now i know what to ask and look for and all the symptoms it makes it more stressful.
Oh and vitex takes 3-6 months to work i took it for one month before i fell pregnant with abbi.
Sunbeam-sorry AF has shown but you knew yourself you were not pregnant same here i know i am not just waiting for the biatch to show.
Warning very long ramble
Mildez - don't know how I'd go peeing on all those frogs!! Ah that's too funny. Camping sounds great - really feel the need to get away atm. Enjoy your bding fest - hope you don't get too sore 
I don't blame you for bursting into tears, sometimes it's just more than we can bare. If it makes your male colleague think twice next time he opens his mouth then good. I have a friend who knows we have been TTC for a long time and she tells me about her friend who is struggling after two months and I said I don't care, I don't want to know about it and that shut her up. And I really don't want to know about it - not being mean just protecting myself which is what you had to do last night. Glad your furbabies are keeping you company and I guess you knew that your temp was going to drop just bummed out for you that it has. I've had the same convo with my DH about donor egg and he is the same - he wants our bub and if he can't have it think he doesn't want to go with donors but who knows he might change his mind after all fostering is someone else's kids and we've talked about that. Can you come clean my house? It looks like a bomb went off! Dad's visiting later this week so guess I'll get to it before then LOL. Hope you have an OK day today - I'm putting a mental shield around you that no more ungrateful skanks or relatives thereof or just insensitive people either ask you about or tell you about pg. OK - shield in place. If they come near you they will have a sudden urge to pee and rush to the nearest toilet. Then they will be disorientated and forget why they are there. I think that'll work. Looks like it'll be Try in July for a few of us and if only that PGD testing wasn't so expensive fingers crossed you'll get a good healthy one x
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