Ok after too many cycles to count and two m/c, one just 7 weeks ago I am starting to ask myself why am I still trying.
I have lost that burning urge I had to become pregnant since my recent loss. I use to "feel" raw, hard and tough emotions around TTC and I have none of that in me anymore. I don't even feel sad in my defeat if that makes sense.
To be honest I have not actually shed a tear about my m/c since it happened. I was hysterical the night it was happening to me, I cried for what was happening, for what was not going to be. But since then I have not cried, I haven't felt angry I have just felt devoid of emotion. I have had bad days and time out but I am wondering will the TTC emotions ever come back? You know the hope, the excitement, the frustration? Anything?
What keeps you going? What keeps you coming back for more? How do you 'feel' anything?