hello my dear friend first up i want to send you a big cyber hug xox

I would agree with the others... being numb and "no longer caring" is a survival mechanism in us...i think we would go mad otherwise...

What keeps me going i am actually not quite sure but I do know that i wont go on like this forever either as i need my life back too... I have a low egg reserve as you know and i am pre menopause which puts me in the over 40 category even if i am "only 33" so i guess the time factor is what kept me going all this time
So for me it's like now or never.... and if it has to come to the point of - never. i at least need to know that i did all i could so i never beat myself up thinking - should i have done this...would it have made a difference if i would have done that...it would haunt me for the rest of my life...

So i sucked up the pain of 3 years of TCC naturally and with Clomid... so i know i did all i could in that department ... now i am at the end of my road as i was told i have no time left and i will give IVF a shot... if it does not work i will have to walk away too but at least i will know that i did everything in my power right till the end if that makes sense...

So my 2 cents worth - stay numb and "not care" not obsess with TCC till August, which may take the pressure off things... and as much as we hate hearing it - we all know that pressure and obsessing is the biggest enemy when TTC...so let go for the next 2 month and just go with the flow do what feels right BD if and when you feel like it... and if no BFP comes out of it you can still cross that IVF bridge if need be...

Really hope it all works out for you in the end one way or the other . xoxo