it coluld be delayed shock helena, as you said throughthe whole NICU time you just run on auto pilot and even when you are home and things are still really bad you just go along and do what you have to do, and until you you have time to really think about whats hapened thats when it all gets on top or you

I know you love your kids i can tell that from reading your posts an i agree you do need time to be you not just a mum, thats not selfish at all you have been through a traumatic 14 months and i know you sill have a hard road ahead and you nee to be have time for you in order for you to be able to deal with whats going on

If you ever need to talk Im here i understand what your going through, and whats funny i am typing all of this to you and i really should take me own advice