Higher plane (to me) just means the soul is at a different place, unencumbered by human frailties. They are without hate, jealousy, fear. They are in a higher plane, surrounding us with love. Not in the sense of heaven and hell where the good go one way and the bad go another. I guess just surrounding us, not tied to the earthly plane.

Probably as clear as mud
To me - 'higher plane' means to progress or move on in the cycle of reincarnation or karmic evolution. Not to go up.. just on. Does that make sense??
:yeahthat: to both... not literally higher...same as your higher self.

I seem to be having issues getting my point across today - that or people everywhere are being overly sensitive and taking offence to everything lol

So I just wanted to add to my above post that "selfish" doesn't mean "bad"...

I think in our society we are taught that being selfish is bad or wrong, something we don't wish to aspire to. However, I would like to use the word for itself, not for it often misused assumption that those who doing something selfishly are bad...

Just want to clear that up so I don't upset anyone. "Selfish" is simply self-serving, self-oriented... about ones self, with no regard for anyone else.
And when applied to grief, then it is not bad or wrong to be selfish, it is so so personal a thing to experience.
As I said, I think it is selfish, but that isn't bad, and nor does it mean it isn't natural or necessary. It is not something to be stifled or hidden.

I gotcha and I think the argument with my friend years ago was caused by a similar misunderstanding. I think I used the word selfish earlier...and then worried I may have offended. But it is exactly what you said - it just means it's about YOU & how you feel, not the soul who has departed. And it's not bad at all. I would like to think that when I go, I will be missed enough for people to be a bit selfish & sad for themsleves.