Parenting After Miscarriage or Loss - February 2010

[Willow]

:yeahthat:

I agree with Bek. I'd take it slowly and work on one issue at a time. I don't know if I have any useful advice re dummy because thankfully neither of my DS's really had/have one so it's not something I've had to deal with for them. DD however did have a dummy but we never had to get up to replace it for her, she always managed OK. Are you happy for her to have the dummy to settle but just don't want to be getting up to her when she looses it? If so, a friend of mine (who had twin girls) worked around this by using a dummy chain clippped to the girls' sleeping bags. I can't remember the brand, but it had a very short ribbon as opposed to a chain and there is just no way it would wrap around a childs neck etc so she was never concerned with safety. It worked really well. Dummy never got lost and they would just find it at the end of the ribbon and pop it back in.

If you want to get rid of the dummy altogether...I would gently suggest you wait until she is a bit older. In my experience, 2 is a very difficult age to do this and if you wait just 6 months even, her verbal skills and her understanding will be so much more advanced and you'll probably find that it is much less of a battle. This is what I did with DD, she was about 2 and 8 months when we did it and it was a non event really. We had tried earlier when she was 2 and it was hell. When she was that bit older we were able to explain what was going to happen ahead of time, talked and talked and talked about it.

I'm not sure about the bottle because my kids never had one but L does have a sippy cup with a bit of milk while he's having his bedtime story and I want to cut this out soon-ish. I think Bek's idea of giving her the bottle outside of her room, or even in her room but not in bed, is a good one. This is pretty much what we've done with L and he doesn't associate it with going to sleep, more as part of the bedtime routine itms??

Also - this absolutely might be because of the little mister's arrival. DD was an excellent sleeper (hindsight's a beautiful thing ) but she had a sleep regression after DS1 was born that lasted a few months. I was getting up to two of them for a while and it nearly did me in. Good news is...it does pass once they adjust

Anyway, I don't think I've been much help but I wanted to try because I know how awful sleep issues are and the stress they create I didn't realise you had any issues with DD's sleep. I hope things improve soon.

Gotta get ready for school but BBL...

OK, I'm back.

Just wanted to say...Janie - guess where I went last night?! The DENTIST!! It went surprisingly well. No problems at all, no fillings or anything nasty like that. He even did x-rays which surprised me a bit but they were all clear. So I just had them cleaned which I HATE but had to suck it up because I had DD with me and it was her first time. She has 'beautiful' teeth I'm pleased to report and no issues with her either. She even let him clean her teeth which surprised me because she gets a bit anxious about things like that but she wouldn't let him use the vacuum sucker thingo. She told him 'can you put that away please and don't use it in my mouth because I'm very scared of that' At least she was polite about it!! I also asked him about the wear on my teeth. He said he has seen a lot worse and it's nothing to be overly concerned about. Talked to him about a splint and he gave me a quote so I'll probably go back in a few months and organise that. AND our health fund covered the gap so instead of paying $325 () it cost us nothing - bonus!

Deb - You are in my thoughts.