Christy, I had a bit of a tear at your post last night, it really struck a chord with me.

And Jillian echoes some of my ponderings over it all too.

I was chatting to my Mum about it this morning too, in relation to high spirited kids......

So here is an example for you:

Placid, easy going little girl.....compliant, who, in addition to her nature, was fairly well "trained to please" by her parents.....ie "good girls" get love, "naughty girls" are not loved.

Fast forward 7 years........same compliant child is SO easily lead at school, is a "follower" rather than a leader, and bends to peer pressure all the time in a desire to be "liked".

Fast forward another 25 years, same girl is STILL overly eager to please, gets taken for granted in most areas of her world, has a ridiculous drive to be liked, still asociates being "good" with being loved, and is unhappily aware of this........

Take heart in the fact that Matilda is such a spirited princess.......whilst it is evidently really tough on you all at the moment, I am convinced that you are parenting her in the exact right way to allow her to develop into a strong and fiesty chick who will love herself as much as you & Pete do.......which is the best gift any Mummy can give her daughter.........xx