Maz all i can say this is such a wonderful, wonderful thread ... thank you from the bottom of my warm heart to your's

... DP & i said our goodbye to TT#2 not long ago (we had be trying for 2.5years) and as i am turning 44 next month it just feels so much harder being further away from it all. I many times feel like i'm grieving for those baby years of my now 3.5year old DD & know i will never be able to experience them again, then there is the guilt of not being able to give my much deserved and beautiful funny character DD a sibling like any other child may have but then i think to myself i put in a pretty good darn effort for my age (body might be getting old but i dont feel it, LOL) and i reckon one day when she can understand i will hopefully hear from her how proud she is of me for getting as far as i did at almost 44

Then yesterday it hit me like a lightening bolt i ' might ' yeh maybe get to be a grandmother one day if i live long enough ... and then the excitement came flooding back ... i just ' might ' have another bubba to cradle in my arms again one day that is part of me

So DP bought it to my attention that if DD has her 1st baby at 40 like i had her at 40 i would be 80 as a grandmother and fingers crossed i'd still be around to squeeze in that magical experience ....... (or if not maybe i will go foster a ton of children, like my own Mum fostered )