Thanks ladies. I think this thread has convinced me that I'm doing all I can to make it tolerable (I cook in bulk or meal plan so dinner is actually a breeze, DD1 generally has five or so full outfits in her wardrobe that she can just put on and I try to shower the night before but this is tricky because DD2 often wakes up mid-shower).

It's the absolute irregularity of DP's shifts that drives me bananas. His start and finish times vary so much even when he's on "earlies" or "lates" and he may work five days before having a day off or he may work eight days. Or anywhere inbetween.

So after seeing what a difference it made having DP home the last two days, I've decided to put DD2 into childcare next year starting with two days a week (in addition to DD1). It's a bit earlier than I'd wanted (she'll be about 18 months old) but a few days ago I felt lower than I had in a while and I think I really need two days a week where I can do something for me (bearing in mind that DP often works weekends so in effect, I'm giving myself a weekend). So I'm planning to study.

I appear to have become addicted to brackets.