I agree with Jen that kids need to be able to voice their wants, needs, wishes, hurts, etc in a safe environment. But they need to be respectful and they also need to know that sometimes their wants, needs, etc are secondary to the group's wants, needs, etc. Often in life you just have to do "as you are told" even if you don't like it. You cant complain. You just have to suck it up.
we dont just let her have her say and she gets away with it - if she is saying something, we listen, and then we talk through WHY her thought process is right or wrong. it often means a heap of back and forth and soooooooo many WHY's - but we don't have a "just because" attitude - it never worked with me when i was growing up, and i suspect DD is so much like me that we NEED to hear her and make sure she understands rather than just telling her "this is how it is". being simply told to do/be/act in a certain way just led me to rebelling against things - when the reasons why i should do/be/act in a certain way were explained (actions and consequences) i got it - and when i knew why i shouldn't do something, i wouldn't do it....

it's definitely a balancing act - but i think teaching kids to suck it up can be harmful - teaching them WHY is far more healthy