thread: c section acceptance

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  1. #1
    Registered User

    Jan 2009
    pakenham, victoria
    3,660

    c section acceptance

    Hi all,
    Bit of a weird one here, hope it make sense!

    The thought of a csection scares the absolute pants off me,like really really scares me! i'd much rather a 50 hour labour than have one.
    But fact is im 99% sure i'll be induced with this baby because of my diabetes, and well we know what can happen there. obviously keeping everything crossed that some sort of miracle happens and i go on my own, but most likely not.
    So how do u become accepting of a csection? theres so many books and thing about fearless natural birth and natural birth skills to have u prepared but not much on csections.
    Were u petrified of a csection and then had one and it wasnt as bad as u thought?? i can even begin to imagine what it will be like coming home to an 18 month old and a 4 yr old with a newborn.
    i know induction doesnt alwayds mean csection but i need to be prepared because theres a real chance it might happen
    hmmm seems a bit mish mashed, hope u all get me!!

  2. #2
    Registered User

    Jan 2007
    7,197

    Totally understand hun. For me I was absolutely devastated that I didn't VBAC, I was terrified of surgery and still feel a bit ill thinking about it all, however in the whole scheme of things, it wasn't too bad. I had no complications from the surgery, caring for my then 17mth old was actually fine (although I had DH home for 7 weeks) I was able to hold J in recovery and fed him well back in our room. I kept up pain meds so that I could be on my feet faster and really it wasn't that bad overall. My existing issues are with a failed vbac not so much the cs itself.

    I have to fly - DH needs the lappy but wanted to pop in and give you a and reassure you that it can be ok if it comes to that. Back later to talk induction with you!

  3. #3
    Registered User

    Jul 2009
    2,109

    Great thread. To be honest, I was okay with it at first because I just focused on meeting my baby. It was after she was born that I struggled with what had happened. I was very disappointed that I was 'foggy' for the first day of her life and that I could hardly get out of bed. I felt like I was a fly on a wall watching all of our visitors come in and see our gorgeous little girl. That said, other than the emotions of the whole experience which could just be due to the hormones - it was really not that bad. I had no idea what to expect and the pain was tolerable. I was most scared of the cathedar (Sp?) and that was fine too. Second thing on my fear list was the spinal block and that was also fine, in fact I hardly felt it and was surprised at how awesome it worked!

  4. #4
    Registered User

    Jan 2007
    7,197

    Ok back quickly! If you do need to be induced there are a few things you can do to try and help you go into labour by yourself with assistance. If they are inserting gel try and get a bit of time to see if you will go into labour spontaneously with it - so a reapplication after initial application if it hasn't worked. If they break your waters, again ask for some time to stir things up, I had mine broken at midday and went walking around the hospital to try and bring bub on. If they put you on the drip - get them to start on absolutely the lowest dosage possible and to increase things slowly as possible as well. I think having a few births behind you will be in your favour too as your body has been there, your cervix has a "memory" so hopefully your induction won't lead to a c/s. I know there are lots of ladies who have had very successful inductions on here too hun.

  5. #5
    Registered User

    Jan 2009
    pakenham, victoria
    3,660

    Thanks girls, glad to hear it wasnt as bad u thought.
    Tan im holding onto hope that my body remembers what to do because its done it before.
    My labour stalled with DD2 and i was put onto the drip and went from 3cms to pushing in an hour and a half, so i think thats a good sign that we'll be ok.
    Garrrgghh if only there was another way to get them out!!

  6. #6
    BellyBelly Member

    Jan 2008
    In beautiful chaos!
    2,335


  7. #7
    Registered User

    Mar 2010
    Happy Land
    319

    I know how you feel. I was terrified of having a csection, absolutely petrified. We had done calm birth classes and were all ready for a natural birth but it was not meant to be for us. I had an amazing OB who was well aware of my fears and did a fabulous job of putting my mind at ease and helping me to understand that this is what we needed to do for a healthy bub.
    The csection was nowhere near as bad as I expected it to be, I used the breathing and visualisation techniques that we learnt at the calm birth classes to help me through the prep before surgery and it didn't take long before DS was born and then I was too caught up in him to even think about what was going on.
    My recovery could have been better but I believe that had a lot to do with the hospital that I was at, they were very anti pain medication and I was not strong and assertive enough to stand up for myself. I think if I had kept up my meds like Tanstar I would have had a much more positive experience.
    I didn't have other kids to look after and would have probably been ok to be home by myself with DS from the 3rd week after surgery but with this pg I will be asking DH to take 6 or 7 weeks off as I think it will be more challenging with an active toddler to look after as well.
    for a lovely natural birth but if it's not meant to be then try not to be too scared of the csection, it really was nowhere near as bad as I thought it would be. GL

  8. #8
    BellyBelly Life Subscriber

    Nov 2005
    Langwarrin. Victoria
    1,654

    For me I was accepting of having the c-section...we had mutually decided on an elective c-section a few weeks before the birth due a combination of the diabetes and bubs large size. That said i was petrified of the mechanics of the c-section, the thought of a spinal and being cut open etc etc. In hindsight it was for nothing...it was honestly the most beautiful experience in the end, even though it ended up being a sort of emergency caeser a bit earlier than our planned elective for various reasons. Now if we are lucky enough to have number two I would actually choose an elective c-section over an induction.....it was easy, empowering and just as beautiful for me as a natural birth would have been. Maybe I have low expectations I am not sure but all I was really focussed on was having a healthy live baby at the end of it after so many losses and i was not so hung up on the process as I could have been. You probably been told this but the statistics for a type 1 diabetic are roughly 50/50 so there is a good chance you may end up with a c section but it does not have to be a bad experience...mine wasn't...just keep focussing on that beautiful baby boy that your are finally going to get to meet at the end of it and try not to get too fixated on the how...one thing i have learnt after 31 years as a type 1 is to be flexible...it's hard to do in practise and very frustrating but if you can try and be as flexible in you rmind as possible it will hold you in good stead.
    Oh and the recovery will not necessarily be bad...i was up nd about within a few hours and visiting Connor in SCN and off all but panadol by the itme we came home....yes it is probably a bit harder bending etc but honestly by week 3 I was back to all normal activities except heavy lifting...if your hubby has leave make him do all the heavy stuff and kid wrangling...you just focus on the new bubba. It may not come tp that however...you may go early completely naturally and have a wonderful vaginal birth and this will all become a moot point. I hope that it is the case for you!

  9. #9
    Registered User

    Jan 2009
    pakenham, victoria
    3,660

    Thanks Mel, obviously if it comes to it i'll do it, in the big scheme of things me having a section is 100 times less scary than what he's going to have to go through when he has his heart surgery.
    i think the being reliant on someone during recovery is another issue i have, ive always been so indipendant and DF wont be able to take time off, if he doesnt work he doesnt get paid and we dont eat! lol so ill have mum here to help and thats an issue i have.

    Mel- off note here but was C always measuring ahead at scans and things or was his growth something that happened in the last tri? i thought bub would be measuring atleast a little bigger but he's not

  10. #10
    Registered User

    Jan 2007
    7,197

    That sounds promising hun! The other thing you could do once you know when they want to induce is to have some acupuncture done to assist in inducing. With acupuncture, Chinese herbs and my yoga class I had 3 weeks of Pre labour and dilated to 3 cms. xox

  11. #11
    Registered User
    Add aussienic on Facebook

    Feb 2005
    Boyne Island
    6,327

    I will just tell you my story rather then trying to offer advice if thats ok

    I had a text book labour with my first son so just assumed that is how I would do it 2nd time round. i was scared of labour cus lets face it it hurts When i was pg with my 2nd son i had GD and was told he was on the larger side. At an US at 36 weeks he was off the scales.. From around 32 weeks on I was constantly being told I would have to have a c/s. I was fighting it the whole time as I really really didn't want one. I was terrified of it..

    at my 37 week check up (well a couple hours before) my waters broke. My app that day was to discuss how I was to deliver. I was all ready to fight for a natural delivery.. Anyways.. While waiting for the Ob I had a few contractions and as we had been told due to his large size he might get stuck well I got scared and opted for the c/s. It really was not as bad as I thought. Sure the next day was pretty painful but if I knew then what I know now it would have been a hell of a lot easier.

    I was terrified on the table, i was so scared something would go wrong with me. but if you go in prepared ie knowing what to expect and how to deal with the pain ect.. for example. When standing for the first time breath deeply and evenly and stand straight and keep repeating to yourself this is as bad as it gets and that is true cus the next time you stand it isn't as bad..

    The way i explain it to people is that with a natural delivery you are in pain for how ever many hours then you get the baby. with a c/s you get the baby then you have some pain. it is all about how you manage it..

    I hope I made sense.. If you want anymore advice or whatever just ask me here or pm me. I have had 3 c/s and one natural

  12. #12
    Registered User

    Jun 2005
    USA
    3,991

    I'm really scared of a c-section... I'm also scared of most emergency care I would recieve after a car accident if I think about those too. I figure if things are that dire then it wont be fun but I'll get through it, you know?

    I'd be very concerned about the need for a c-section being caused by interventions though... I don't see how diabetes spells an induction for you when it sounds like you weren't induced with your other children? Do you have diabetes or gestational diabetes? There is no reason you can't go post dates with GD.

  13. #13
    Registered User

    Jan 2009
    pakenham, victoria
    3,660

    meow, i developed type 1 diabetes at the start of the year, i know i can go over 38 weeks if u choose to go into the hosp every second day and have montioring to see if my placenta is holding up, but the fact is the hospital is an hour away not in peak hour traffic and i have 2 little girls in tow, even my normal appointments are very stressful for me and very boring for them, do really not doable unfortunately.
    Diabetes does mean an ealier delivery because the use of insulin causes the placenta to have a shorter lifecycle than normal.

    Ausgirl, thanks for ur story and your tips hun, i really appreciate it.

    Mel no private D doc, just whoevers on at the clinic

  14. #14
    Registered User

    Feb 2009
    Brisbane
    1,070

    I was terrified of a c/s, really really didn't want one! But when it came to the crunch I knew it was the only way to make sure both my baby and I didn't die (I had severe PE). I did get induced with an unfavourable cervix, and the induction itself was going fine. Unfortunately my blood pressure just wouldn't stay down at a safe level and it was decided that it was time to get bub out. It was scary, but I knew I had done everything I could, and that it was for the best.
    The c/s was fine. The staff were great, and my recovery was fast (even with all the extra PE drugs being pumped into me). I was still able to BF and bond with my baby.

    I have had a VBAC now, and even though I know that I prefered the VB for the elation and even easier recovery that it involved, and will be gaing for VBAC2 this time, it isn't something that I think about regularly. I don't compare my children by the way the entered the world. It doesn't make me love one more than the other. For me it was a way of getting my baby out, and in the grand scheme of things, it doesn't really matter how they came out.

  15. #15
    Registered User

    Mar 2006
    7,046

    The first thing I like to ask people when they tell me they are afraid of something (especially when I'm admitting for surgery at work) is "what are you afraid of/what is concerning you?". If you can answer that question, you can then seek the answers that are going to help you to make peace with the possibility of a C-Sect.

    I could tell you about my experience (induction followed by emergency C-Sect) but that won't necessarily answer the questions you have or alleviate your fears and concerns. I could give you a step by step account of what happens when you have a spinal or epidural and what will happen in the theatre. I could tell you what the most likely response to any number of scenarios in the theatre will be... but that won't necessarily address your concerns or questions. So if you can identify what it is you're afraid or worried about, you might get some more specific answers and experiences that will help you.

    I think it's great you're being proactive about this too Skybie. Good for you!

    MG

  16. #16
    Registered User

    May 2008
    North side, Brisbane
    754

    skybie - i don't really know how to help you overcome your fear, but i have had 2 now and they were just fine. the only suggestion i can give you is regarding the epidural ... which is not just cs related, but the first time i had one, i jumped when they tried to put it in. of course nothing bad happened, but then they told me to push my bad towards them and that worked fine. the second time i was ready for the needle, and i don't even remember if it hurt or not, so it couldn't have been that bad, but i just concerntrated on my breathing and stayed as still as i could. it was just fine.

    i hope you have a natural birth, perhaps try all the teas, herbs, oils, pills, etc to try and self induce your labour. gl for you. take care and all the best xx

  17. #17
    Registered User

    Oct 2007
    ★ nor here nor there ★
    4,134

    Firstly

    This was something that I had to come to deal with it, I needed to be able to accept it as well, and like you I decided to make preparations early so that I was able to have plenty of time to get my head around the concept after having a very quick VB with DD1. DD2 was breech, and we were expecting growth issues, while my OB was more than supporting for a breech delivery it came with conditions, bub had to be over 2kg and less than 3.5 or 3.8kg somewhere around there. I tried so much to get DD2 to turn but she couldn't, we did an ECV at 28 weeks and I've done so many inversions it's not funny on top of other things. after 32 weeks I felt that she wasn't going to turn, as she had tried, but just couldn't get around. But we were then moving into the ok zone for a breech delivery. After there things went downhill, growth slowed and then stopped, I ran out of amniotic fluid and the decision was made to deliver at 35 weeks. Things that I struggled to deal with was chosing the date, I couldn't do it, and I am glad that the decision was made by my OB, I wasn't given the choice. I did have a thread about it, but it got lost in the big crash of Spetember 2010.

    I also wanted to make it an empowering birth, I was concerned that I wouldn't feel as though I birthed my baby because I didn't do it the "natural" way, or the same way I did with DD1. So I started a thread asking how other people made their CSection empowering, I needed ways that I could have some control over the birth, my decisions and choices, also what I could ask for. I received some amazing feedback, the thread is here if you want to read it.

    I think a big part of it for you will be about bubs as well, because he is likely to come out blue, there are a lot of things that change at delivery whether it be a VB or CS, he will go to resus, you amy or may not get a hold, hopefully with just a bit of 02 you will be able to have a cuddle, but I would assume that they will be keen to get him to NICU quite quickly to monitor and assess how he is going. I think this is a part that you need to prepare for as well, whether it be a VB or CS, being left "alone" as such can be really hard. I've gone through it twice and I have to say the second time was easier, DD2 was taken over to resus after I was able to touch her foot, then a few minutes later she was bought over to me and I was able to hold her, but I could see that she wasn't doing so well, she was blowing bubbles and her breathing was pausing, so she was back to my Paed and off to the SCN pretty quickly, and I sent DH with them, I was taken there after I came our of recovery lying on the bed. With DD 1, I had a quick hold on my belly, then she was taken to resus and to SCBU3, I didn't see her for a few hours.

    But I have to say the CS itself was great, I walked into the threatre, which I felt was really important, there was no reason that I couldn't walk, I had my last contraction as the Anaethatist was putting in the Spinal, DD was fully engaged (although I didn't realise at the time) so she was "ready", I had spoken with my OB, MW, and our Paed about everything I wanted to achieve earlier that day and what the "plan" was going to be, we also went through the "if things don't go well" plan, so I was fully aware of what the proceedures were going to be. No issue with the section at all, infact for me it was quite fascinating (I love medical stuff though!), it was also light hearted, music playing, everyone was quite jovial, I was asking my OB where she was up to, everyone was getting all excited when she was about to be delivered, but no one wanted to know if it was going to be a boy or girl Our team was ready for what ever needed to happen and they had people prepared should we need a transfer for DD2, so i was completely relaxed and knew that we were both in the best hands.

    My recovery wasn't brilliant, I am not going to soften it, because it hurt, I had no idea what to expect really, I took the meds, but one MW suggested dropping them too quickly and things went bad for a while. I had no idea the pain that would occur if my bladder or bowel was too full and my meds were wearing off, I couldn't move it DD1 was moved into my room in the isolette, so once I was able to get up to her I did, but for me it wasn't pain free, and I think the dropping back of the meds too early really set me back You will need to keep them up as much as you need to, don't feel pressured to drop them as I know you will be wanting to get up and down to the SCN/NICU, but getting up and about will be good but you will need to rest as well.

    So while I would still chose a VB over a CS, a CS wasn't that bad, and for me I knew it was the safest thing we could do to bring DD2 earthside, neither of us would be able to cope with a VB, as we couldn't stop the Nifedipine for me (or my BP would have gone through the roof!) and DD2 was not in a good enough condition to attempt a breech induction. So I have been able to accept having a CS for these reasons, I wouldn't elect to have one just because, I had one because medically it was the right thing to do.

    I hope you can find your own way to accpet the possibility of a CS, and I really believe that informing yourself and being prepared for what ever eventuates is a really intelligent way of doing it
    I am here to chat more if you need me xxoo