I would second everything that everyone has said re thr pregnancy bringing up his emotions about losing the baby.
I also thought I'd throw in there about the IVF conception. It's a very clinical way to go about it, so he could feel dissociated from the whole conception thing too because all he had to do was "shake in a cup" so to speak. It's certainly not the intimate and enjoyable process that we are all lead to believe it will be, so maybe that's brought up some strange feelings for him too?
But mostly, I'd say he's probably processing the loss from his previous relationship and maybe you could try talking to him about that?
DH was like this, this last pg and even for the first week after bubs was born. He only snapped out of it when I went completely mental and broke down at him about his lack of excitement. He was genuinely surprised, he didn't realise that that was how he was coming across. He was very worried about certain things, but he actually was very happy about bubs, he just wasn't showing it very well, because of he's fears and anxieties.
My DH was the same & I remember feeling very worried!! He never voluntarily touched my belly. He only felt DS kicking when I told him to & even then didn't leave his hand on me for long. He just didn't seem excited at all. I remember feeling very rejected too.
The only time he ever seemed excited was when we heard the heartbeat, that made it "real" to him.
It's not indicative of how they will behave once the baby is here. My DH is completely different now that DS has arrived.
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