I found out with both but told everyone we didn't find out. I referred to the baby as he sometimes & she sometimes. With DD, even DH didn't know I'd found out and he still has no idea! It was incredibly hard keeping it secret though so if you think you'll struggle and don't want everyone to know, don't find out. If it was just up to me, I would have found out & told everyone both times.

Therebel - just make sure you tell them at the start of your scan that you don't want to know, & they will normally try to avoid that area totally.