hi mummy2chloe,

I conceived with my son Mustafa, after 5yrs fertility treatment. he passed away cos i went into labour too eary at 23 wks i was stitched up but culdn't hold on . cos my cervix had torn i had to hav an emergency c/section. to add to that the doc nipped my bladder so i've not done too well. at least, now i know i am someone's mommy. some one i thought i would never be!

i had been taking injections to ovulate cos i didnt get AF. i actully did for the first time last month naturally without any medication but i tested day 31 so i dont think it was too early. no AF but not unusual. we will try until JAn and then go back to hospital for fert treatment.

I do feel scared about losing my DH over the obsession, so i have a reality check most days and think about whether i could live without him aswell. just the thought of losing him freaks me out so like you i try and relax.so, yeah i totaly know what you mean.

fasting at the moment so really tired even though i've been sleeping a lot. but, i think fasting has come at the right time it's sprirtiually healing in a strange sort of way. my sons due date is 17th october not looking forward to it. but, maybe i can convince my DH to take me to the cemetry.

sorr, guys i'm going on and on dont mean to bore you. take care