Trying to Conceive after Miscarriage/Loss -February 2009

[nicjay]

Eliza - I've heard lots of different answers to do you O from alternate ovaries each month, some say no and others say yes. I have had quite a few cycles tracked through my IVF clinic over this last year or so though, and I did O from alternate sides each month.

Did they tell you a reason why they think that you got the cyst at all? A lot of cysts are from a follicle that doesn't rupture and release the egg (although can be other reasons as well) - I have had this happen to me one cycle last year, didn't O according to my prog levels and next cycle when I had a tracking scan there was a 3cm cyst present. I had another scan at the end of that cycle though and the cyst had gone, a lot of them do resolve by the next cycle and you can still fall pg in the meantime.

As for the more fertile after a m/c, I have heard that too and all I can say is it didn't apply to me worst luck!! Maybe some ladies are and some aren't, don't really know the answer to that one. I also had a curette, so waited out one cycle - maybe that made a difference who knows? Maybe you are more fertile with a natural m/c than a D&C

Also I was not at all relaxed when implantation happened with this pregnancy, I think being relaxed doesn't hurt, but don't stress yourself about it if you aren't relaxed KWIM? If it is going to happen it will still happen.

Good luck!

Hi and to all the other lovely ladies here xx

[Tuesday's Child]

Mel - I'm sorry you've been feeling down Even though you only knew you were pregnant for a week, all the love, hopes and dreams of a lifetime were felt during that week. Jen got it right when she described it as soul-destroying to lose all that so quickly. But don't feel you have to stay away when you're feeling down (I know I'm guilty of doing just that at times). We're here for you. Take care of yourself hun.

Mo3B - I hope you're not feeling better, IYKWIM. Fingers crossed that you get a BFP real soon.

mrzbaby - A charm is a beautiful way to remember your angel. Goodluck with the weightloss.

Easha - Glad the scan went well. Goodluck with the NT scan next week.

Rhi - I'm glad you are feeling inspired. I hope that with your naturopath's help you are on your way to a BFP soon.

boble - Wow you have been busy! I'm sorry things aren't looking good for you this month. At least it sounds like your body is settling down again.

sally - Unless there is a medical reason to wait, the suggestion of waiting 2 or 3 cycles is usually to allow time for emotional healing. And as mrzbaby said, waiting one makes dating easier. But it is completely up to you when you decide to try again. Personally, I waited one cycle. I needed to give myself that time before I could make the decision.

jen - Sorry AF showed At least she waited until after your birthday, I suppose. Now that you mention it, I never had a follow-up u/s after my D&C. This is the first problem I've had, so could it still be tissue remaining after all this time? I thought I would've had more bleeding or pain or even infection by now. I might bring it up next time I see my doctor though. I've been charting CM the last two cycles, but have now started temping this cycle.

meh - I hope everyone in your family is getting over the bug now. I can't really answer your questions, but your symptoms sound promising. How much longer until AF is due? I have fingers, toes and everything crossed for you (except my legs of course ).

Eliza - I've never had a cyst so I can't answer your question. I've heard people say that you are more fertile after a m/c (especially a D&C), but this has never really made much sense to me as I've never heard a medical explanation for this. By the way, planting a tree is a fantastic way to remember your angel. You have something to care for and watch grow.

AFM - DH and I have managed to salvage the last few days before returning to work tomorrow. We've pretty much done nothing but relax the last few days. Although DH is taking advantage of the beautiful weather we're having today to paint our fence.

[charm]

Sally I'm so sorry for your loss I felt the exact same way as you when I lost my baby .

Jen-I am unsure why my right ovary is swollen he said it can be normal with pregnancy and I was too scared to tell him 10 days later hubby and I started trying again maybe that could be it really I am unsure I go to the GP on wed I will ask his advice.
It's bizzare I've never noticed all the babies and pregnant ppl aoround as much as I have in the last 3 weeks but I am trying to be very positive and take a day at a time it is working for today but hey it's only monday.

[RhiChiChi]

Boble - Sorry to hear that you might be out this week, but like you said - your body could be sorting itself out. Hope you get some bd action anyway (and at least without pressure - iykwim)

Sally - Welcome. Sorry that you have to be here under these circumstances. I didn't feel guilty, more why us? but definately alone and empty (until joining here). GL with you ttc journey and stick around as the support is amazing!

Hannah - Glad you guys are resting. Nothing like doing nothing to re-charge!

Charm - I hear you about noticing lots of pg people at the moment. I keep looking at their lovely round swelling bellies and trying to picture that being me soon! So hard to do, but trying to be positive.

Hello to everyone else... Will be back probably Wednesday as I am back at work tomorrow.

Take care

xx

[Mel1979]

Just a quick one, will be back for persies later.

Just wanted to say thanks to everyone for their messages of support. What would I do without you girls

Coco - You do o from alternate ovaries each month. I never knew this until I had my lap and my Dr told me I had o from the left ovary the previous month and was going to o from the right the next. Funnily enough I only tend to get o pains on my right side. I have heard it is easier to fall pg after a m/c but it didn't happen for me unfortunately My tubes ended up being blocked though which would not have helped.

HannahD - If your tubes or anything are blocked it won't show on an u/s. Only way to tell is through a lap and flushing your tubes (this is what my Dr told me anyway). My right tube was blocked for over 12 months and I never had any symptoms or pain or bleeding and no infections. Worth checking out.

BBL........

[boble]

hi everyone.

Sally - welcome and sorry that you have had to go through this experience.... all the ladies here know only too well what you are going through and it is so totally normal to be feeling the way you do! thinking back to the time straight after my m/c - its hard for me to believe where I am now... straight after I just didn't think i would survive it again!!! but I have - and every day i feel better (well, most days - some days you have a down day).. i guess all these ramblings I am doing are just to say that although the now really really - well, its unbearable... i promise things get better. Look after you and your partner!

Rhichichi - yep, been catching up a plenty on the bd action.. its been great haha - and I guess you just never know

Charm - i know what you mean about seeing so many babies and preg people around. after my 2nd m/c i was quite bitter with all the preg people or people with babies and little ones.. but this time around i seem to have lost that (well, for now anyway). I know how tough this time is and just wanted to send you a hug

Hannah - good to hear you got some relaxing in with DH - lovely!

coco - Hi!! its amazing how many questions pop up at a time like this I was also told that you are most fertile after a m/c (natural or d&c) and also straight after going off the pill... but.. im not sure?? after I went off the pill i fell preg the first month, which was great.. but after my m/c it took another 4 horrific cycles.. and then with the last m/c i am up to cycle 2... so fingers are crossed it happens quicker this time around. good luck in any case my dear - sending lots of baby dust your way

meh - i can't help overly with the thrush in the 2ww question as I am just not sure.. i am very prone to thrush and uti's - in fact, i often get one or the other after every af - that is if i dont' take accidophilus (sp?) tablets every day.... but i hope that it is a good sign for you - sending you lots of baby dust too!

Jen - DH and I are taking a bit of a break on the "intense" ttc iykwim.. we had decided to not worry about charting or anything like that for the first couple of months that we are ttc again ---> so that is just off my CM. I used to temp/chart and i did try using opk's but it seemed that the ones i bought were duds.. because i didn't ever get a + but ended up pregnant

so... I had the "egg white" cm friday, saturday and sunday.. on sunday it was getting a bit more watery (sorry if tmi) - dh and I bd'ed sunday afternoon as it was the only chance we could get... so hoping we might be in with a small chance. oh well, what will be will be is my motto this month.

sorry if i missed anyone. thinking of you all

[Shortcake]

Hello ladies! Sorry I have been such a lurker lately. I'm just really not sure as to what my body is doing and I'm very frustrated. AF was due Friday and never showed. So Saturday I gave in and POAS and got a BFN! So now I'm back to I was before no AF and no BFP. Hope everyone is doing well!

[jen805]

Hannah--Glad to hear you and DH got some R&R before returning to work! So how handy did that relaxation CD end up being after your vacation? I'll bet you were grateful to have that around!



charm--Good luck with your appt. on Wed!



and *hugs* coco, Rhi, & mrzbaby!



Hey smelly Mel! Hope you're feeling better today! Big *hugs*



boble--Saying lots of that you caught that eggie! It only takes once!



Shortcake--Sorry to hear about your BFN It's so frustrating when we don't know what are bodies are doing! Sometimes it takes time for your cycles to get back to normal--a year later, I don't even think mine have completely gone back to normal! Then I wonder, was it ever normal? Hope something happens for you soon!

[plc1805]

plc - Hi, I have a question for you....Did you have severe endo or just mild? The dr told me I only had a mild case but it still could have been causing us to have fertility issues. He said some people only have to have minor obstacles to have problems whereas others can have more severe issues but never have a problem. I guess I just wonder as I had my lap a few weeks ago and am due for AF next week and so hope it doesn't come! Trying not to get my hopes up though but it is so hard Big to April!

Apologies Mel for the late reply!! My endo was only in the earliest of stages and it was causing my infertility. I had no warning signs - no pain at all - but as I am a 28 day cycle girl, the only curious thing that happened was that I had 2 cycles in 3 that varied by 2 or 3 days which was very strange for me - and one of those cycles lasted 3 days instead of the normal 5 days. My ob was the one who suggested to have the lap - it never ever occurred to me that I might have had endo. When I had my lap, the endo was found and cut out straight away. When I was able to start TTC, we conceived straight away. That's why I am convinced it was the endo that was causing the infertility. Endo, as you say, is such an erratic condition. You dont necessarily get pain and infertility is not always an issue. Was your doctor happy for you to TTC straight after the lap? I was advised to wait (even tho it was the hardest thing I have done - very upsetting) til 6-8 weeks after the lap. I am glad I did cos it just gave my body a full chance to recover and get back to normal. Happy to answer any other questions if you have them. Big hugs hun - you WILL get your baby.

[Mel1979]

Hi everyone,

Tried to post again last night but couldn't get onto the website. Will come back tonight for persies as will have more time.

Just wanted to say -

Plc - Thanks heaps for your reply. I had the lap to check for endo but also to check if my tubes were blocked which can happen after a m/c. I am not sure if my endo was in the early stages or not but was told it was a mild case and they managed to remove it all. It was only around my pelvis area which was lucky. Plus my right tube was blocked in a few places with mucus from my m/c over 16 months ago so they cleared that as well. I wasn't told to wait any cycles though, my Dr told me I could start trying straight away. Trying not to get my hopes up as I am looking at it as if we are starting again from stratch and it could take up to 6 months. The Dr said to TTC for that long before considering IVF.

Thanks again, you give me hope which is all I can ask for. Big for you and April.

So back to the waiting game.....

[chappas]

Hi Ladies,

Hope everyone is doing well, sorry not time for persies will have to catch up.
Just wanted to let you know had scan today went really well bubs moving around a lot with lovely hb.

Thinking of you all

[smilanatu]

Good evening ladies...just popping in for a quickie...everything seems to be going well (I truly hate the shots!)

Just wanted you all to know I pray for you daily and I am thinking of you even when I'm not logged in!

[Tuesday's Child]

Mel - I hope things are looking a little brighter for you today Thanks for the info. I had a D&C and am pretty sure they flushed my tubes then. But I've never had an u/s to confirm there are no products of conception (for want of a better term) left. But if this was the case, I would think that I'd have some symptoms 7 months later.

boble - A small chance is better than none at all. Hoping you caught that eggie.

Shortcake - Sorry about the BFN. Maybe it was too early to test. for you.

jen - Yes that CD has really come in handy. But I still got another tension headache last night. First day back at work and I had to leave early . How things with you? I hope AF isn't being too hard on you.

chappas & smi - Glad everything is going well for you and your little ones.

for everyone else.

[mrzbaby]

Hi all,
Well today was going along well until i realised it was tuesday....( yes for those asking doesn't she even know what day it is...I didn't)
Have been thinking about this for about 3 weeks now.
Tomorrow marks my half way mark ( well 4 months but half way for me as I go 3weeks to 4 weeks early)
Finding tonight very hard... haven't cried yet but I think I am not that far away......
I have made the decision about not trying again.... Yes I know I am emotional but seriously i think the 3 D&C's have taken any determination of TCC out of me and I am thinking that I should be content with my 3 precious kids that I love and adore. In my heart I know I can't go through this again and usually if I want something so badly i can picture myself with it and it is just not happening... I can't see myself and DH with a baby, and I have to say that the fear of what I went through has been enough for me to have made me make that decision.
It is not just the D&C's making this decision but the fact that my cycle will take about 4 motnhs becuase of all the D&Cs to come back and up to a year to go back to normal... not that I am old but I had said to DH that if I wasn't preg by June this year that that would be the cut off and unfortunately the cut off has been made for us. Then there is the Clomid issue that we have and the very BIG increase of twins ( last bub we scored on our own I 'O'd all by myself for the first time in ...gee I don't know.) I have twins and triplets on my side of the family.
DH doesn't know and I don't plan on telling him for a few months so that when he finds out he won't blame it on my 'emotional hormones'.
Going to the Ob on Monday and going to ask him about the pill or injection or something similar as DH hates condoms and so do I..
Yes i will still pop in occassionally to see how you are all doing... hoping that none of you will be here when i do pop in though.
I do wish everyone hug amounts of
and wishing your TTC journeys are short.

Take care,


Em

[boble]

Hi everyone.

well.. my body is confusing me now.. as I mentioned in my post the other day I had some egg white cm last friday and saturday.. on sunday i also had a bit but by sunday afternoon/monday it had gone a bit watery. This morning I had very strong ewcm again. I am not temping or opk?ng atm so i don't have any clear indicator as to if I have O'd or not... what do you lovely ladies think? do you think that I am yet to O???? sorry if my question is tmi

tia

[Mel1979]

HannahD - Yeah, I'm pretty sure they flush your tubes with a D&C. I never had to have one at the time which is why my tube was blocked and I never knew! You are probably right, if something was wrong you may have had pain but it doesn't hurt to check with your GP. I never had any indication my tubes were blocked although I always felt something was wrong (IYKWIM?) Glad to hear the relaxation CD helps, no good about the tension headache though. I have suffered from headaches all my life so I know how painful and debilitating they can be I we are belly buddies together soon!

Smi & chappas - Glad to hear everything is going so well

plc - Thanks again. I have always had quite painful periods so it will be interesting to see when I get AF this month if it is as painful. Although I would be happier if AF didn't arrive at all! My cycles have always varied between 28 and 33 days with my longest cycle being 35 days in December (not sure where that came from?). I guess I will see if my cycle lengths settle down soon enough.

Jen - Smelly Mel is feeling much better thanks! How's DS? How did DF go skydiving? I could never do it, I get nervous catching a commercial flight so I could never jump out of one voluntarily !

Shortcake - Hope it was too early to tell.

meh - I got thrush when I was pg (before I knew). I didn't want to take anything to treat it either as there was a possibility I could be pg (and I was). When I spoke to the pharmacist she said thrush can be a common symptom of pg due to the heightening of your hormones. I think you have made the right decision to wait and see if you are before doing anything (as awful as it can be). Hope it is a good sign!

boble - Understand what you mean about not ttc intensely. I am taking a break form charting etc as want to try and take the pressure off (IYKWIM?). Hope this is your month. I have learnt our bodies can be very cruel and this journey can be so confusing.

Megsmum - I love to see your ticker moving along! So happy for you

Sally - I am so sorry for your loss. You are in the right place for love and support. Good luck with your TTC journey

Hi to charm, mrzbaby, rhi, mannie, WTH, babymiracles, fifi, coco and all you other lovely ladies!

AFM - Thanks so much for all your messages of support. Feeling heaps better now. I think I just got so overwhelmed Friday night as I realised we had been TTC for 19 months and all I could think is what could have been. I think I sometimes worry that getting pg the first time was a fluke and maybe it will never happen again. Silly I know but I will blame it on the hormones!!!

[boble]

sorry Em.. i posted just after you did. Just wanted to send you a big that must be a hard decision you have had to make... I don't really know what to say! thinking of you xx

[Mel1979]

Boble - Very confusing. Sometimes sperm can be very similar to EWCM so it may be that if you have BD recently? Maybe you should buy a OPT and check? Either that or just keep BD just in case!

mrzbaby - Oh, Em. So sorry you are feeling so down . You certainly have had more than your share of a rough time. None of my business but maybe you should talk to your DH and just tell him you would like to stop TTC for now and maybe make a decision together in a couple of months when you are feeling a little better (physically and emotionally)? It's a tough decision to come to and only one you and your DH can make. I really hope it all works out. Be sure to have a good cry if you need to (a big ugly cry as Jen would call it) as that often helps me feel better so hopefully it will help you as well