Hi Toccara, sorry you have had to find yourself here but I hope you find support and comfort amongst us. What a tough and emotional time you are going through. I am so very sorry for your losses and that you are feeling so down.
Have they found a reason for your recurrent miscarriages? Are you seeing an experienced OB in this field? You may have already undergone tests but I think it is important to arm yourself with all the information you can find before TTC again so you can try pinpoint the cause and hopefully prevent it from happening again. I know it is very frightening but you may feel more encouraged to try again once you know why this is happening and what measures you can take to prevent another loss.
Open up to DH and tell him about your reservations and how much your heart is breaking and perhaps ask him to support your decision to wait until you have some answers and/or are physically and emotionally ready.
Sending you a big and I wish you all the best for the journey ahead. We are here for you every step of the way.
Last edited by dd0207; December 8th, 2008 at 12:25 PM.
Girls have a read of this website. Stories 26-50. It has helped hundreds of girls go on to have healthy babies. Worth a look at. I would be ordering my Doctor to check my progesterone levels. It may be that simple!
Hi Toccara -- welcome to our group, and of course I'm sorry to hear about what you've been through. Try to have a talk with your partner and say that you're not ready yet if that's how you feel. Your emotional state has taken a huge beating this year, not to mention your body as well. I'm sure you'll both be holding your little one soon enough.
Helen -- How are things going now after your stitch? Feeling any better?
Katie -- I've heard the the first time of breast-feeding can be trying for anyone. Hang in there and we hope to hear that it's second nature in a few weeks!
Tocarra: so sorry you have had to join us. I agree with Darcy on the progesterone. I'm not sure if you've read any of our previous posts but I have noticed a big difference in my health since I started using natural progesterone cream. Many other girls here have had other tests and come up with other problems so ask as many questions as you like about testing. The more you find out, the better equipped you will be when you feel ready to ttc again. Also, how long did you wait in between pregnancies. I know my OB always says to wait at least 2 full cycles. I hope you can talk to DH and get him to see that you need a bit of a breather. It is such an anxious time even in the best circumstances and none of us fall into that category so our stress levels are that much higher again.
Katie: don't feel too bad about the breastfeeding. I think it generally takes 6-8 weeks to get any sort of confidence with it. Remember you and Anna are both learning a completely new skill. If you were starting a new job it would take you at least that long to get your head around it. Just give yourself plenty of time and be patient and kind with yourself. Get as much support as you can and don't be afraid to ask. If anyone gives you a hard time, go to someone else. There are plenty of supportive people out there.
Lan: I'm on day 10 and still not sure about ttc this month. I did one of those ionic foot bath detox things. It was pretty incredible but you can't use them when PG. I know I'm not PG but I just don't want to risk having any toxins running around when I am ttc. Also since having that and the progesterone cream I am feeling so much better and after years of no luck am finally losing weight. I know I won't lose what I need before getting PG but I thought another few weeks would get me down to my pre PG weight. It seems a waste when I am just going to put it all back on again but I just have this thought in my head that if my body is back to pre PG then this bub will have the best shot I can possibly give it.
On the other hand I would so love a BFP for x-mas! DH has been away for over a week and only got back yesterday so we are going to discuss tonight. He will probably say lets ttc just so he can get some action!
BTW I have been charting on fertility friend and am wondering how you display your chart on here. I know some of you girls have and I thought I'd give it a go but can't work it out!!
Jo: did I remember you saying you were having this month off ttc and then going next month again?
Anyway, I hope you are all well and all babies are behaving themselves. Hugs all round.
Tocarra, sorry to hear about your third loss, a very heartbreaking thing to go through. I agree with the girls that if you haven't already, it is definetly worth investigating why you may be miscarrying before TTC again, do you have a good OB? I'm glad you found us, welcome to our thread.
Tildy, I hope Kebab has been kicking away. Katie, nearly everyone I know who has had a baby says breastfeeding can be really hard at first. Sounds like you have had some great help. Enjoy your little girl.
Lan & Paula, good luck TTC this month, I'll be right behind you soon. TM, hope little one is growing nicely. Helen, hope your feeling well after the op.
Hi to everyone else. Have a great week.
Last edited by Berry1; January 10th, 2009 at 03:28 AM.
hi girls i'm new on this one i lost my little chloe on the 11-11-08 she was an ivf baby just wondering how long after your loss did people get their first period again? thanks in advance for any information.
Jo, I just wanted to let you know that I have been thinking of you the past few days. I hope that Madison's EDD went as well as it possibly could have.
Tildy, I hope you have been doing well. Try to stay positive, you had a great scan.
dee81, I am so sorry to hear about Chloe. I think it took me about a month and a half to get my first period after I lost Shelby at 28 weeks. My cycle was close to normal after an early loss. Have they been able to find a reason for your loss?
Toccara50, I am so sorry for your loss. Make sure that you are ready before you try again. You will most likely be very nervous through your next pregnancy. Get as much information as you can to help you through it. We will also be here to help you.
Lan, My next scan is Jan.5 right now. The doctor really doesn't know if the baby is just big or if they had an error with my 6 week scan measurements. My cycles are long so right now it sounds like the baby is just big. The baby has measured a couple of days farther along with every scan. So that is really good so far. I can't really go by my dates because I had a loss at 5 weeks during the cycle before this pregnancy.
Katie, I can't wait for you to post some more pics of Anna.
TM, I will be thinking of you on Tuesday. I hope you have a great scan.
Last edited by Laney; December 9th, 2008 at 04:51 AM.
No I have not been tested and I am going to look for new OB because the one I have now is horrible all I have gotten from this OB is M/C is common in the first 6 to 12 weeks ... Yes this had been a very emotional year for me and DH and my body needs a good rest I waited at least 2 cycles each time but my cycles are short most of time I have two in one month and I have no idea when I "O" guess I'm just really fertile or something, I do really find comfort here with you girls because none of friend and no in my family has ever M/C before ...
Toccara, so sorry to hear of your losses you have had such a traumatic year. I don't know how it works in the US but try and find an OB who will do as comprehensive suite of tests. It may be that you can be treated fairly easily and have a normal and successful pregnancy. It is important you do this before you try again, try and explain to your husband that without the tests/treatment you may be risking losing another baby.
Hi Laney, my baby has measured 3-4 days ahead this time as well. It's probably just all the extra blood baby is getting because of the clexane!! Very good sign.
Dee, so sorry to hear about the loss of precious Chloe. It took me just over two months to have a proper period again, and we conceived on that cycle. Every woman is different of course. I hope you find some comfort from this forum.
Hi Tildy, so glad to hear Kebab was just a little twister!! The hospital sounds terrible though, locking pregnant women out, how awful!!!
TM, seeing the yolk sac at 5 weeks is a great sign, do you have any more HCG results yet?
Katie, I hope the BF is going well now. It sounds painful but we go through much pain for our babies don't we!!!
As for me, to answer Lan's Q it does feel a bit strange to be past 22 weeks. I'm a bit concerned because last wednesday the doctor told me to go off clexane, than BAM! on Sunday I had a migraine, which can be a symtpom of thickened blood. It wasn't oo bad but still, the visual aura and numb hand and everything. But I'm holding out, I have another ultrasound in 4 weeks which will check the blood flow and I think it's important that I found out whether I still need the clexane or not.
hey girls!
sorry i have'nt been around much, madisons EDD is today and i am really feeling it. I have to work today and not sure how i am going to get through it as we have a mgt member who does'nt know any of my history. I got woken up by DH and got in trouble for not coming in the shower with him and could'nt belive his selfishness or the fact that he has obvously fogotton. Its so hard to feel like i am the only one who actually still feels something and has more of a connection to these dates. My IVF friend lost her baby at 9 weeks on sat night and on sunday morning i woke up with anxiety pains in my chest. This day has been just looming over me since my friends came in with their baby Jack. I should have a baby due now and i am going into ANOTHER christmas with empty arms. I hate this and am so over it.
thanks for remembering Laney!it means alot!
will post personals another day when i am feeling less selfish myself! sorry girls!
xx
Oh Jo, I'm sorry that you are having such a hard time with all these horrible anniversaries. I think I would've punched DH in the face for nagging about having a shower together on Madison's EDD. Men do grieve and remember our angels differently though. I totally know what you mean and how you feel about being over facing Christmas with empty arms. It's like, you get to 17wks and get thrown back to the start. You try again and make it to 22wks and chucked right back to the start. And all that time you had a living, kicking baby in your tummy then suddenly they're gone and there's no physical evidence of them left on your body or in what should be their room. I know Jo and I am sorry. HUGS!
Here's another weirdo thing I caught myself doing this morning - staring at another girl's pregnant tummy and wishing like crazy that I were her then feeling for myself that I haven't even started getting there yet. But Katie's right, last month was practice, I have started.
Dee, I'm sorry for the loss of little Chloe. It took me about 6wks to get my periods back after I had my baby but the first 2 or 3 cycles were strange. I think my body was still regulating itself.
Toccara, welcome and I'm sorry that you've had such a rough year. Did you say that you get two periods in one month? In one of the books I was reading it said that your cycle should consist of no longer than 17 days before ovulation and at least 12 days after. If you're getting two periods in one month, your cycles are too short and indicative of hormonal imbalance? I'd ask for that to be check out. You can start by charting your temps.
Paula, I can't remember how to post the link to Fertility Friend but I have been banned from charting so would you like to join me in exile ;-)
Must do some work.
Oh, before I go. Hugs to you, Katie, as you battle with b/f. I don't know what that's like but I know how much it hurts when the milk comes in and I do remember reading Baby Love and not being able to figure out the whole b/f part!
thanks girls for the info i guess it will just be a wait and see my fs has told us we will have to wait about 2 normal cycles before we can look at trying ivf again thats why i was wondering.
laney- i leaked fluid from around 20wks it wasn't a definate leak but i always only had small amounts of fluid and chloe was born with hard lung also was only 28wks approx she survived for 4hrs 12mins before she passed.
Jo: thinking of you today. There's not much any of us can do but to be with you in spirit and send our love to Madison so she knows how much she is loved by all of us here on earth. I agree with Lan that men have there own way of grieving, doesn't really excuse the shower episode though. Take care of yourself today and know we're all thinking of you.
Dee: I'm so sorry to hear about little Chloe. Such a pretty name. You will find lots of comfort here. I got my period back 4 weeks to the day Charlie was delivered. I think anywhere from 4-8 weeks is normal though.
Tocarro: good on you looking for a new OB. I agree with Lan, your problems definitely sound hormonal. If you are falling PG you must be ovulating so chances are you have a really short luteal phase. You should definitely get hormones checked, I know low progesterone can cause really short luteal phase and is probably the most important hormone for pregnancy.
TM: how are things going with your testing. I hope you are getting some good results and have everything crossed for you.
Lan: you are definitely on your way to being that lady with a belly! As AF has arrived, you are already in your first week of pregnancy. Your next little bubba is already close to a week old! I'm sure Hamish is doing all he can to send you the perfect little brother or sister, that's why its taking a little longer than you hoped. Enjoy the practise!!
As for me. DH and I had the chat last night and decided to wait till next cycle. I'm a bit flat about it but know that its the best thing to do. I would never forgive myself if I had the choice to wait but didn't and then something awful happened with the pregnancy. I've worked out I will get my BFP on January 24 and will have a EDD of October 3. I'm putting it out there will all the positive vibes I can.
Dee, our posts must have crossed over. It sounds like you've had such a rough time of it. Especially to have gone through all the hassle of IVF as well. It must have been so hard to get through those 4hours but you did. I always say to my DS that only very special families get chosen to make Angels and it sometimes helps us get through those times when you just can't understand WHY? There is no real answer but you obvioulsy loved your daughter very much and I have absolutely no doubt that she knows this and is watching over you and DH as we speak.
I keep hearing a lot of girls that have m/c talk about progesterone ... my cycle has been like this snice last year I was on the depo shot (birth control) for a few years and I didn't have a peroid at all then once I stop it took a year to come back then its stayed for two month stopped and now I have two cycles a month so I do belive my lp is short and it may be the issue here I am going to give my body aleast a few months rest before we try again and find a really good OB who cares and has worked with high risk pg women before thank you all so much for your feedback ...
Hi everybody, I am still here, been lurking a bit! We had our follow up appt today which all seemed to go well, next visit is the 6th Jan for the Morph scan. Now I have to try and remember all that has been going on!
Jo - Biggest hugs to you, you really are having a rough time, be kind to yourself.
Katie - I remember those early days BF, they were horrible, but hang in there it does get better, it took me bang on 8 weeks to get it sorted!
Tildy - I am so glad Kebab is behaving himself/herself, we were all a little worried!
Paula - What a great way to start the new year, your body will be very well prepared.
Hammi - Bugger about AF, I think she is about to make her departure for a while though! In answer to your question, no I can't really feel too much, there is sometimes a sensation up high but that is about it.
Rozzie - I hope all goes well with your ceasing medication, and you don't get anymore of those nasty migraines. Welcome to a new chapter.
TM - I hope your scan went well.
Welcome to Darcy, Tocarra - you really need to see someone about hormonal testing as 2 cycles in 1 month needs to be sorted out & Dee, I am sorry you have had to seek us out, but you have found the right spot to come!
Hi to Laney, Berry, Cindee, Sue & Diana.
There are so many of us to remember, I hope I haven't forgotten anyone!
Last edited by hgirs; December 9th, 2008 at 04:08 PM.
Jo, just wanted to send you big hugs. Madison's EDD as well as Christmas coming must be so hard, I hope the day went OK and I hope DH was a bit more sensitive as the day went on. Are you doing anything tonight as a family?
Jo - thinking of you today on Madison's EDD. These days are hard and you have had so many in the last few days. I hope you were able to take a moment to remember your beautiful daughter and know that she is not forgotten - she is held in many of our hearts. Be kind to yourself and if your DH does seem to forget - then remind him! Sending you hugs and support
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and I wish you all the best for the journey ahead. We are here for you every step of the way.
... Yes this had been a very emotional year for me and DH and my body needs a good rest I waited at least 2 cycles each time but my cycles are short most of time I have two in one month and I have no idea when I "O" guess I'm just really fertile or something, I do really find comfort here with you girls because none of friend and no in my family has ever M/C before ...
you have had such a traumatic year. I don't know how it works in the US but try and find an OB who will do as comprehensive suite of tests. It may be that you can be treated fairly easily and have a normal and successful pregnancy. It is important you do this before you try again, try and explain to your husband that without the tests/treatment you may be risking losing another baby.
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