I went to the hospital but she had left to go home half an hour earlier. I just msg'd again saying I am there when she needs me. Thanks for all being there for me this arvo. I was a mess. Still am but have had a shower and tried to get it together now. Have picked up DD from childcrae and given her lots of squishy cuddles.

I bought my friend a gorgeous little butterfly ornament that is just stunning and it says daughter on it, a candle and then some comfort things. She loves m&ms so I bought her some of those, her favourite drink (diet coke) and a journal.

It feels really strange that less than 24hours ago I was saying to her that I would bring her a bottle of champagne to have a little celebratory drink when Zara arrived and some metamucil that she forgot to buy. It makes me kind of second guess everything I have said to her and wonder whether it was the right or wrong thing to say.