Clairesmummy I have been thinking about you since your loss. Multiple losses are so hard and it sounds like the MIL issue is making a hard time harder. It can be a lonely time. I know i also had that 'black hole' feeling for a while after each loss. Things started to improve as i physically got better. I hope you will start to feel a little better soon. I hope if you feel like you are having trouble getting yourself through the day you will find someone you can talk to (as Dory suggested). Huge hugs... I hope some 'sun' starts breaking through the 'clouds' soon.