I just wanted to say thank you to everyone who responded, your comments have been really helpful in making my decision about what to do this Christmas. Anyway, after much thought and mind changing over the last couple of days, I have decided that I am going to go to all the family get togethers that I can manage, and have told both sides of the family how I am feeling and have asked them to understand if I we don't hang around for long periods of time. So far so good in terms of family taking this news well, but we'll see on the day I guess. I'm going to be pretty upset if anyone gives me a hard time

Some of my DHs work get togethers though we have decided that I won't go to, especially the ones where there are going to be pg women and babies - I just can't handle that ATM A couple of them are more important than the others but luckily for me are smallish gatherings (with people who know what has happened to us) so I'm going to go to them - unfortunately it looks like DH and his close colleagues are going to be made redundant in the New Year (just to cap off a fantastic year NOT!!!) and some of these people are my friends too, so I guess we'll go for however long I feel that I can handle.

Big hugs from me and my gorgeous DD back to those of you also trying to cope with losses over the Christmas season. Take care of yourselves xx