Natters - I am so sorry for your loss. One thing I have learned from my m/c is that you can "what if" yourself and go crazy. We all have them. I postponed what turned out to be my final ultrasound becasue I did not want to miss work. Everyday I think maybe things would have been different if I went. It is much easier to say then to believe, but sometimes things are out of our control. I am not saying it is easy becasue i struggle with it as well in my own situation, but there is nothing you could have done. Like your anaesthesiologist said there was a huge risk because of your surgery. When the time is right you will be a mommy, as will the rest of us. I truly believe that. You are in my prayers.

Barbara