The articles are certainly not pro-controlled crying which is why I used the word anti, I think makes them "anti" ? which isn't neccessarily bad, as we are all anti-negative effects on our children. Perhaps I should say pro-choice or something? Sorry for ANY offence caused, and any appearnace of judgement not what I'm tyring to do!! Anyway, I'm glad the articles are there, this is not against them being available as they have important valuable information.

We all have to mother in a way that works for us and not judge - as Kelly said. Just join each other in support as mothers. Hence this post -->

But at what point is controlled crying - controlled crying and therefore causing the potential harm? which is why thanks for the definition Tulip. This may be the same as saying "how much alcohol can you drink before you damage your unborn child"

I agree that information is empowerment, which is why I was asking for a clearer definition of controlled crying to be available and what members here think it is, and their experiences with it/or whatever. I guess I wanted to start a discussion as I have come across a lot (ok only 6!) of first time mums who have heard/misheard about the potentially harmful effects of "controlled crying" and think it means that if your baby cries and you don't hold them you are practising 'controlled crying' . I've met at least 2 mums who are sitting up all night with their babies on their laps as the baby may cry a little if they put them in their cot. I don't criticise this, if this is what they want to do and it works for them etc. but often it's NOT working for them in terms of they are SO tired from dozing all night, the bub appears to be tired too and so on. They mention articles like the ones on this site as why they are doing what they are doing, and ask me what to do/what I did.

I find it difficult to support/advise mums as I have never had any real trouble settling my babies they don't seem to cry for very long and I didn't see this as controlled crying (see previous post)

Does Pinky McKay have some stuff on this- or do other readers have any recommendations? Has anyone else heard of mums like these or do I just find them??

thanx guys in advance.