I agree in that there are times when we need to choose our battles otherwise life would seem like a constant battle.

Both parties here are digging their heals in and not wanting to give in, it's a tricky situation but i'm leaning towards the mother having the right to make a choice for her child and that in respect of her mothering the IL's should not push the situation.

Again i hope things can sort themselves out without too much disruption to the family.