We actually had a big discussion about this very topic in one of our antenatal classes. I know I haven't actually had my first yet but based on the discussion in the class, I'm going to be very careful about visitors.

The MW said exactly what some of the PPs have said - that the MWs/nurses can be your watch dogs and they are more than happy to kick people out/restrict visitors. Their care is for you, bubs and DH, not the visitors. So if you want quiet time, you can tell the MWs not to let any visitors in. The MWs tell your visitors "X had a really bad night last night and is resting, please come back in an hour/a day/whatever". They don't care who they offend!

I think it can be such an exciting time for everyone, people forget how stressful it can be for mums and bubs.

Also, with regards to home, if people ring and ask to visit, be honest if you don't want them to come around. Or say something like "Sure you can pop around, but we don't have any milk or food in the house, can you please pick up some lunch/afternoon tea?" Or when they get there, ask them to help - ask them to make teas and coffees or lunch or whatever, or ask if they'd mind throwing on a load of washing or giving the kitchen a clean.

Families especially should be there to help - not sponge off you and expect you to be running around after them when you have just given birth!

I don't think it is rude at all hun about DH's family. My mum and sister have already announced they will be there to cook and clean for us when we want, which I am completely comfortable with, but if DH's family were there I dunno, it'd be a different story!