bilby's dad's fridge was very bare, i suspect more to do, with his lack of planning, (used the day before xmas to do things that really could have waited, rather than doing the weekly food shopping - which was sorely needed). He kept giving her white bread rolls with cheese on them every few hours, so she technically was being given food - but wasn't eating it. I can't understand why he would invite us over (bilby's desire, was to have xmas with both of us), with so little food in. I felt embarrassed once i realised. Went home last night with bad hunger pains.

i do go thru with her - if you weren't here, i would be devastated, daddy would be devastated, list off all the people who would miss her. List all the people who love how she draws, mention how many people love her just because she is her, not because of anything she does.

We are alone at xmas because bilby has one little cousin, same age, who lives interstate. There are no grandparents. One auntie, who has gone on holiday. That's it. Bilby is alone most of the time. I will attempt to arrange some playdates during the holidays (inbetween 12.15 VACswim lessons). All her classmates live 30mins away (near her school). One mum wanted us to go iceskating with her and her DD, but i declined, we need low cost playdates. Bilby is very social, loves being with other kids. I struggle with being able to provide her with that. Our neighbourhood is very dodgy, so she is not playing with the other kids on our street.

thanks for listening to my vent. i just want to make it better for her, and obv i can't. Doesn't stop me desiring to fix it for her, irrational i know.