I'm so angry at the way I acted.

[Willow]

Yup done it. Sleep deprivation changes your very soul I think. Its horrible. You do things you wouldn't ever see yourself doing.

:yeahthat:

[Ginger]

i've done it...only my calling out included the F word as well....oooppps!
it's so frustrating when you're so tired...but hang in there, it does get better!

[Snacks]

Totally done it. I remember patting DD for about 45 mins non-stop when she was about 4mo, watching her eyelids droop and then seeing her literally shake herself awake. I was sooooo exasperated, I didn't make it out of the room before I screamed. I seriously scared her and she started to really cry instead of just whinge. I felt really bad. But at the time I was so exhausted and pent up, I just had to let it out.
I am glad that Ava's had some good sleep today and that you were able to catch up a bit this morning. Hope tonight's a better night.

[westy]

Oh Ren

Please please please dont feel like you are a bad Mummy because you are far from it, you are a great Mummy to the most precious little girl . Like the other lovely ladies have said we have all been there done that at some stage or another. Being a Mummy is not an easy task and when you are so sleep deprived it makes an already hard job even harder. I think you should give yourself some much earned credit- your doing a wonderful job parenting little Ava dont let this one little incident drag you down.

Take care of yourself, you know we are all here for you. Big hugs to you

[Shanti]

Aww thanks girls I feel so much better.

Ava was such a little angel tonight after her massage, bath and feed she went down as soon as i put her in the cot only took a few minutes.... hope tonight goes OK.
Wish me luck!!!

Gosh, this mothering business would be sooo much harder if we didnt' have other Mum's to chat to.

[Willow]

Gosh, this mothering business would be sooo much harder if we didnt' have other Mum's to chat to.

I was just trying to explain this to my DH today - he thinks I get too caught up in what other babies are doing, don't do, how they do it etc. He doesn't understand that just hearing another mum say 'me too' can make all the difference.

Hope you have a great night

[Spring Angel]

Another guilty one. I remember one night about about 10 hours of crying during the day I just lost it and yelled 'shut up'! I couldn't believe I'd lost my temper but we are all human and we do the best we can.

[mbear]

Yep, another one guilty here - i can tell you 3 stories of the 3 times i did it to each of my 3 girls.....
Best advice i was given was from a nurse, whom said when you feel like that (i had 2 outta 3 that didnt sleep in the day...i sooo hear what your saying) just go outside for 5 mins, baby isnt going to hurt themselves, isnt going to die, just go outside, breath in some fresh air, chill out a bit, then go back inside...i found it worked. Bit harder to do at night i know....but even just getting your DH to settle her for 5 mins whilst you grab a glass of milk or something...it does make you feel better.

Also.....sleep depo is nasty. I remember (and will be there soon) having days where you are just crappy and very negative and think the whole world just suxs...then after a good night sleep (well......good with a newborn...) you feel on top of the world the next day, you could take on anything, and think to yourself 'how could i have felt crappy yesterday?'......

I totally relate to your post...and no doubt will be posting something similar in a few weeks...

YOur doing great....

X

[Ca Plane Pour Moi]

You snapped ONCE? In three months? You didn't go in there and scream "why are you torturing me?" in your child's face? Your DH got up and gave her a cuddle pretty much as soon as she started crying? You just muttered outside her door?

Expletive, I really am messing DS up. My favourite lullaby when DS was just a few months old and doing this to me was "hush little baby, don't you fret/Mammy hasn't thrown you against the wall yet" or words to that effect because I was so sleep deprived and over it all.

You're doing a fabulous job, Ren.

[Just Me]

My favourite lullaby when DS was just a few months old and doing this to me was "hush little baby, don't you fret/Mammy hasn't thrown you against the wall yet" or words to that effect because I was so sleep deprived and over it all.

can so relate to this

[Arcadia]

You snapped ONCE? In three months? You didn't go in there and scream "why are you torturing me?" in your child's face? Your DH got up and gave her a cuddle pretty much as soon as she started crying? You just muttered outside her door?

That's exactly what I was thinking. Well done on lasting 3 months! I think the first time I snapped she was only a few weeks old.

We all have those days hun. Yesterday was one of those for us, and I was all like "fine, don't sleep, see if I care..."

I have also picked up DD with frustration and felt terrible afterwards for being so unloving. *Sigh*. Its so hard some days!

[Indadhanu]

I've done it, and inserted some swear words. It's frustrating and exhausting and I definately got the guilts (especially since I had my nose up my ass to that point and said "oh i'll never do that" ). It's hard hun, and the pressure we place on ourselves to be supermums is HUGE. But we are human, and a baby who cries and wakes all night and doesn't sleep is enough to test anyone. No one is judging you stop judging yourself

[Shanti]

Thanks girls!!!!!!!!!!
Last night was a much better night even though DD woke every 3hrs to either feed or settle she was pretty good. And this morning I found her in her room at 330am practising squealing!! (it was very cute) and I just left her there and she eventually fell back asleep! (don't ya love it when they do that - rarely!) I don't feel as tired today. Probably that rest in the morning helped yesterday.

I have to admit.... when I said I haven't lost it in 3mths, I need to explain it better! YES I have had moments where I've said to DH "omg you take her i can't handle anymore right now!!" when he got home from work etc so i've done that a few times thats for sure!! And gone into my room and had a bit of a whinge/cry/hissy fit!!! lol but felt better afterwards. I've also left her with DH at 7pm one night and said "i'm going to bed! You give her a bottle if she is hungry" LOL (breastfeeding). And he did. But I got a good nights sleep that night!!!!! Did what I needed to do at the time to remain sane! But this was the FIRST time where I've actually yelled and aimed it towards my DD. But heck she probably didnt even know it was aimed at her anyway as i was standing at her door saying it. I just have a VERY guilty conscious

BloominRoses - aw thats lovely what your Mum left you. It's a funny version of the real twinkle huh?! hehe
Gigi - gosh Gigi! How did you cope on 2hr feeds for that long!!!!!! what a superwoman....

Thank you everyone sorry i cant reply to all of you individually but thank you i don't feel like such a bad mum now!

[Shanti]

Can I ask you girls who have babies who don't sleep much in the day......

If you've tried and tried to get them to sleep and they won't and it's been like an hour of trying.... do you give up? Let them play on their mat for 20mins or so while you chill out then try again??? Just interested to see what you girls do.
I want to enjoy my little girl too and not feel like all I'm doing is trying to make her sleep!!! LOL iykwim

[Heaven]

Yes, I do the same as anna 'fine, be tired, I don't care!!' pmsl.

if i'm desperate I use the HAB. I am torn bc I don't want her to rely on it but also I don't want her to be cranky all day from lack of sleep.

[Just Me]

I got to the point with my DD where I was so tired during the day I would lie down on the couch with DD in her rocker beside me and I would sleep. If she cried I would rock the rocker without getting up (if her nappy is changed, she is fed and she has played there is really nothing else you can do). I found she would settle quite well in her rocker and it was a relief for me to not have to hold her while she was screaming. Our rocker had an activitiy bar so DD would often play. I often got in a few catnaps between her crying and sometimes she would even fall asleep and we would both just sleep in the lounge.

Is that the sort of info you were after?