Well that doesn't really give us many options then does it. Given that your DP doesn't want to care to pursue option 3 (the preferred option) then that really only leaves option 1 or 2. I don't see how we can ever do the right thing because you are not creating a workable situation. The reality is that the situation we're in now is the situation we've been in for a long time. Your DP has avoided option 3 and when someone wants to avoid all contact then you hardly feel welcome in their home. This may have not been explicitly stated but you know when someone doesn't want to be around you. You said yourself that after each visit here you vowed never to visit again so I feel that your DP has wanted to cease contact for some time now and has put that plan into effect. You can't have it both ways though. Since he doesn't want to see us then you can't also complain that we haven't visited.

This is a no-win situation. You are obviously unhappy with the way things are presently but aren't creating a space for things to change. I feel until he has advanced in his therapy it's one that we wont be able to resolve. You know for now I'm done talking about this. I feel that nothing I can say will make things better so what's the point. Your DP wont even respond to my messages so I don't feel like he values our relationship at all. Perhaps I'll contact him when I've had time to come to terms with all of this and find out if he wants me to be a part of his life. Unless he wants that and tells me directly I don't see how we can more forward.

\exits thread
I take it that you both know each other IRL then?