bjrose i would have a harsher consequence. I don't in general offer a consequence i can't escalate. So if she draws on the walls she goes into time out. She can tantrum all she wants, but she still has to go to the naughty step.

I would at some point think of something that would really bother her - having her stereo/tv/whatever taken away. Then warn her well - if you do this again i will take xxx away for a week. She WILL do it again, she wants to see if you mean it. Follow through, fully. Even if after 4 days she is an *ANGEL* the punishment goes on as prescribed until it's done with.

It might also help to give her responsibilities and privileges due to her age so she can feel older than your littlie across the board, kwim? So if she only has the same rights/responsibilities as little DD, why should she behave better than her? Allowing a child to stay up even 30 minutes later at night, have special tasks she is allowed to do or help with, anything that increases in her pride in herself and her growing abilities. It sounds like she reckons little DD has a better deal than her and wants a slice of the pie! You have to make HER deal seem the more attractive option, does that make sense?

Bx